Getting the snip.

smcapstick

Member
Location
Kirkby Lonsdale
That's a full prostitute :whistle:
Filled from the top, or from the bottom?

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Howard150

Member
Location
Yorkshire
I had a cyst removed from my pipes yrs ago .Worst part was the Dr bringing students to view my veg patch while he doodled on my bag with a marker pen.Dont help im a member of the Acorn Knob Society either :oops::(:ROFLMAO:

A few years ago, a young man near here was delivering car parts to a ‘Big House’. Whilst doing so - bearing the nature of this thread - he was set upon by a ferocious and unfeeling Rottweiler which occasioned severe damage to his most prised and very personal possessions, not to mention some other somewhat severe injuries to his person whilst fighting it off.
Next day after emergency surgery, whilst agonising in his hospital bed, a very young female doctor walked up to his bed and pulled the curtain round. Without further ado he threw the covers off to reveal what was left of his anatomy and the remnants of his weapon.
“Oh - very very nasty” she said.........”actually it’s your hand I came to look at” :D:D

Joking apart I recently spent 8 hrs in casualty at Jimmy’s in Leeds. I take my hat off to the staff who were brilliant - but as for the experience - we’ll one best forgot. A veritable hell hole. There were the usual high number of very old and very sick in there - all of whom having paid their dues all their working lives - were well deserved of attention.

There was a large contingent of people who simply should not have been there.

What’s more of concern was the large contingent of police officers - 14 at one point - at the ratio of 2-1 with spaced out druggies. Bit like a police social club really less the beer. Nearly forgot the 3 social workers on hand to wave their magic wands.

Had blood pressures done - 3 times coming in at 117/77. (Howard - you are not going to like what I have to tell you but for your age you are a very very healthy man - “why is it then that I am doubled up with pain unable to stand on my own 3 massive hernias all torn bigger trying to cough Aussie flu up)

Whilst having blood taken (nearly an armful) I said to the young nurse with the needle (it being 3am) “young lady you deserve a medal for working in here under these conditions. Is it always like this on a Friday night?”
“Oh no no no” she said “it’s like that every night of the week”:eek::woot:
 

Al R

Member
Livestock Farmer
Location
West Wales
The Queen was visiting one of London's
top hospitals and she specified she wanted to see absolutely everything. During her tour of the floors she passed a room where a male patient was w*nking.
"Oh my", said the Queen, "that's disgraceful, what is the meaning of this?"
The Doctor leading the tour explains;
"I am sorry your Majesty, but this man
has a very serious medical
condition and is only following doctors
orders. His body produces too much
semen and his testicles keep overfilling.
Until we can find out exactly
what is causing this problem he's been
instructed to do that at least 5
times a day or there is a danger that
his testicles will explode, and he
would die instantly".

"Oh, I am sorry", said the Queen.

On the next floor they passed a room
where a sexy young nurse was giving
a patient a blow-job "Oh my", said the Queen,
"What's happening in there?" the Doctor replied,
"Same problem, but he's with BUPA".
 

Howard150

Member
Location
Yorkshire
Come on now guys. We are all different as are the experiences we have. Pain is a fairly personal thing both in how we register it and how we deal with it, so deal with it how you see fit.
Getting too macho after some surgery can come back and bite you in the bum. Similarly if your stoynes end up the size of your fist then you will need to have a few steady days.
Always remember though ‘no pain - no gain’ it will be worth it in the long run.
 

SFI - What % were you taking out of production?

  • 0 %

    Votes: 79 42.0%
  • Up to 25%

    Votes: 66 35.1%
  • 25-50%

    Votes: 30 16.0%
  • 50-75%

    Votes: 3 1.6%
  • 75-100%

    Votes: 3 1.6%
  • 100% I’ve had enough of farming!

    Votes: 7 3.7%

Red Tractor drops launch of green farming scheme amid anger from farmers

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As reported in Independent


quote: “Red Tractor has confirmed it is dropping plans to launch its green farming assurance standard in April“

read the TFF thread here: https://thefarmingforum.co.uk/index.php?threads/gfc-was-to-go-ahead-now-not-going-ahead.405234/
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