diary of a comedy sheep farm

Lili · May 15, 2022

yellowbelly said:
....I've no idea what causes it, but would like to announce the arrival of a set of twins.

Totally unrelated to the sheep world (unless you account for the fact that their granddad is a shepherd), I can reveal (to paraphrase the late Margaret Thatcher) that "We are a grandfather"

Our daughter has just had identical twin boys (not sure if these are babies or just bald blokes )

Had the afternoon off yesterday to get acquainted with the little guys, 5lb 14oz and 6lb 2oz.
Mother and boys doing well - although, I'm guessing mum is going to be pretty knackered for quite a while to come

So, I'm here to buy to all a drink, to wet the babies' heads...

Congratulations to all the family. Lots of hard work, but lots of fun!!

Lodekka · May 15, 2022

Congrats to mother and babies!
May they forever have a moisture meter in their hands!

onthehoof · May 15, 2022

yellowbelly said:
....I've no idea what causes it, but would like to announce the arrival of a set of twins.

Totally unrelated to the sheep world (unless you account for the fact that their granddad is a shepherd), I can reveal (to paraphrase the late Margaret Thatcher) that "We are a grandfather"

Our daughter has just had identical twin boys (not sure if these are babies or just bald blokes )

Had the afternoon off yesterday to get acquainted with the little guys, 5lb 14oz and 6lb 2oz.
Mother and boys doing well - although, I'm guessing mum is going to be pretty knackered for quite a while to come

So, I'm here to buy to all a drink, to wet the babies' heads...

That's fantastic

, can never have too many helpers at lambing time

yellowbelly · May 15, 2022

onthehoof said:
That's fantastic , can never have too many helpers at lambing time

Too true..... their 3yo big sister is already a 'great help'.....

onthehoof · May 15, 2022

yellowbelly said:
..I've no idea what causes it, but would like to announce the arrival of a set of twins.

No doubt there is some very good genetics on their dam's side

robbie · May 15, 2022

yellowbelly said:
Too true..... their 3yo big sister is already a 'great help'.....
View attachment 1036174

That gate wouldn't stop a lot if it was in North Norfolk!!!!!!!!!

wrenbird · May 15, 2022

Congratulations to all! What lovely news. I’m quite envious of big sisters gate-climbing wellies, little stars for a little star, wish I could have a pair like that.

onthehoof · May 15, 2022

Lincolnshire Hurdler

spin cycle · May 16, 2022

sunday/ monday

two reasonably productive days without me ending up knackered

K came in sunday as her last lambing sunday...not that there was anything doing

but i took the opportunity to get on with more pasture topping until 11:30 when i knocked off and went to view some hay locally from somebody moving...26 x 4'6'' bales of nice horse quality stuff at £25/bale...in honesty i probably shoulda haggled a bit more off but there

lunch..sit down then at 3pm .along with boy&mrs spin, we went up the farm and de nailed/sorted/stored some reclaimed pine floorboards neddy wanted rid of

.....he's been absolutely no bother during his stay...been quite nice having them TBH

monday

phone rang 7am...it was K...she'd fallen by the wayside having accidently eating something with gluten in it

...she has almost as many food allergies as poor old HH

....anyhoo admiral and i set to and we did chores by 10am and i was off pasture topping again

we did have one little snottage incident....admiral made a hash driving thru the hurdles twixt field and yard....a posse of snot took full advantage charging around the yard looking for 'plunder'.....fortunately the bucket of fodder beet distracted most and we were able to escape to top of yard and secure our second line of defence despite hurdler 1792 and 'xl' (remember her).....they all wandered off later and i was able to retake yard after lunch

finished pasture topping by lunch and did housework in afternoon

anyhoo....a little conundrum....what would you do?...let us say for example 'somebody' (purely hypothetical) forgot to put a belt on their shorts one morning and whilst en route to an orphan lamb pen.....bucket in each hand....aforementioned shorts start to succumb to gravity.....to lazy to stop/put bucket down the 'somebody' attempted to traverse the last 20 yards by firstly 'widening their gait' hoping a wider stance might help...secondly think 'erotic thoughts' in the hope of a temporary 'tent pole'.... only to be dashed by age

....although in fairness the age problem was rebalanced by the 'somebody' not caring about 'letting it all hang out'

so i guess the question is...'in 2022 is it acceptable (again hypothetically) for someone to arrive at an orphan lamb pen with their shorts around their ankles?' :scratchhead:

edit....assume clean underpants if it helps the 'calculation'

Radio · May 16, 2022

Reminds me of taking muck samples from lambs one evening in the dark with son, lambs held up against gate as he was getting sample by torch light . Son thought 2 welsh farmers seen from a distance doing this might be giving the wrong impression. So Spin only acceptable if no one has seen you and you don’t tell anyone, in this hypothetical situation. Obviously you are now thinking of moving diary to the tabloids.

onthehoof · May 16, 2022

spin cycle said:
so i guess the question is...'in 2022 is it acceptable (again hypothetically) for someone to arrive at an orphan lamb pen with their shorts around their ankles?'

Haven’t you got one of those super lambing cameras

, is there any secret footage???
Could post it on the W.T.F. thread

spin cycle · May 16, 2022

Radio said:
Reminds me of taking muck samples from lambs one evening in the dark with son, lambs held up against gate as he was getting sample by torch light . Son thought 2 welsh farmers seen from a distance doing this might be giving the wrong impression. So Spin only acceptable if no one has seen you and you don’t tell anyone, in this hypothetical situation. Obviously you are now thinking of moving diary to the tabloids.

onthehoof said:
Haven’t you got one of those super lambing cameras , is there any secret footage???
Could post it on the W.T.F. thread

HYPOTHETICAL

............

robbie · May 16, 2022

onthehoof said:
Haven’t you got one of those super lambing cameras , is there any secret footage???
Could post it on the W.T.F. thread

That's streamed via a pay to view service!!!!

robbie · May 16, 2022

spin cycle said:
sunday/ monday

two reasonably productive days without me ending up knackered

K came in sunday as her last lambing sunday...not that there was anything doing but i took the opportunity to get on with more pasture topping until 11:30 when i knocked off and went to view some hay locally from somebody moving...26 x 4'6'' bales of nice horse quality stuff at £25/bale...in honesty i probably shoulda haggled a bit more off but there

lunch..sit down then at 3pm .along with boy&mrs spin, we went up the farm and de nailed/sorted/stored some reclaimed pine floorboards neddy wanted rid of .....he's been absolutely no bother during his stay...been quite nice having them TBH

monday

phone rang 7am...it was K...she'd fallen by the wayside having accidently eating something with gluten in it...she has almost as many food allergies as poor old HH....anyhoo admiral and i set to and we did chores by 10am and i was off pasture topping again

we did have one little snottage incident....admiral made a hash driving thru the hurdles twixt field and yard....a posse of snot took full advantage charging around the yard looking for 'plunder'.....fortunately the bucket of fodder beet distracted most and we were able to escape to top of yard and secure our second line of defence despite hurdler 1792 and 'xl' (remember her).....they all wandered off later and i was able to retake yard after lunch

finished pasture topping by lunch and did housework in afternoon

anyhoo....a little conundrum....what would you do?...let us say for example 'somebody' (purely hypothetical) forgot to put a belt on their shorts one morning and whilst en route to an orphan lamb pen.....bucket in each hand....aforementioned shorts start to succumb to gravity.....to lazy to stop/put bucket down the 'somebody' attempted to traverse the last 20 yards by firstly 'widening their gait' hoping a wider stance might help...secondly think 'erotic thoughts' in the hope of a temporary 'tent pole'.... only to be dashed by age....although in fairness the age problem was rebalanced by the 'somebody' not caring about 'letting it all hang out'

so i guess the question is...'in 2022 is it acceptable (again hypothetically) for someone to arrive at an orphan lamb pen with their shorts around their ankles?'

edit....assume clean underpants if it helps the 'calculation'

If it's in the privacy of your own sheep shed who are we to judge!!!!!

If it makes you feel better I know of someone who one summer time accidently split his shorts climbing a pig gate. Now, this wasn't a problem as said "person" had overalls on but a little while later, this"person" had to take his kids to school, so he took off his pig poo covered overalls and duly delivered his kids to school.

Howeber while queuing up this "persons" youngest was getting anxious about something so being a good dad he crouched down to comfort his boy.
Being summer time, under his shorts, he was wearing what could be described as loose fitting high ventilation boxers....

While crouched down talking to his son, he couldn't help but think how nice it was to feel air gently circulating around.........after a moment realisation struck and said "person" glanced down to see his crown jewels gentle swaying in the breeze a few inches from the tarmac playground like a half full fert bag on a loader tine

Flat 10 · May 16, 2022

robbie said:
If it's in the privacy of your own sheep shed who are we to judge!!!!!

If it makes you feel better I know of someone who one summer time accidently split his shorts climbing a pig gate. Now, this wasn't a problem as said "person" had overalls on but a little while later, this"person" had to take his kids to school, so he took off his pig poo covered overalls and duly delivered his kids to school.

Howeber while queuing up this "persons" youngest was getting anxious about something so being a good dad he crouched down to comfort his boy.
Being summer time, under his shorts, he was wearing what could be described as loose fitting high ventilation boxers....

While crouched down talking to his son, he couldn't help but think how nice it was to feel air gently circulating around.........after a moment realisation struck and said "person" glanced down to see his crown jewels gentle swaying in the breeze a few inches from the tarmac playground like a half full fert bag on a loader tine

Powerful imagery there. Have you ever considered a career as a diarist?

robbie · May 16, 2022

Flat 10 said:
Powerful imagery there. Have you ever considered a career as a diarist?

Nah, I can't compete with his lordship anyway, I'd have nothing to write about as I've told all my little anecdotes on here already.

Ps I'm glad COVID came along and by the time school opened again most of the parents had forgot..........well the would look at me again and some would even give a half hearted hello.

spin cycle · May 16, 2022

Flat 10 said:
Powerful imagery there. Have you ever considered a career as a diarist?

had me worried i confess...thought i'd opened 'pandora's box'....not a euphamism BTW robbie

robbie · May 16, 2022

spin cycle said:
had me worried i confess...thought i'd opened 'pandora's box'....not a euphamism BTW robbie

Dam!!!!!!

Sharpy · May 16, 2022

robbie said:
If it's in the privacy of your own sheep shed who are we to judge!!!!!

If it makes you feel better I know of someone who one summer time accidently split his shorts climbing a pig gate. Now, this wasn't a problem as said "person" had overalls on but a little while later, this"person" had to take his kids to school, so he took off his pig poo covered overalls and duly delivered his kids to school.

Howeber while queuing up this "persons" youngest was getting anxious about something so being a good dad he crouched down to comfort his boy.
Being summer time, under his shorts, he was wearing what could be described as loose fitting high ventilation boxers....

While crouched down talking to his son, he couldn't help but think how nice it was to feel air gently circulating around.........after a moment realisation struck and said "person" glanced down to see his crown jewels gentle swaying in the breeze a few inches from the tarmac playground like a half full fert bag on a loader tine

Did similar wearing a boiler suit inspecting a van......

robbie · May 16, 2022

Sharpy said:
Did similar wearing a boiler suit inspecting a van......

But....I'm guessing you weren't inspecting the van in the middle of the village pramary school playground!???

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