Dealing with depression - suicidal thoughts - Join the conversation (including helpline details)

[Farmer1001]

Morning all. Iv been on sertraline for 4 months now. I wasn’t expecting a quick fix but in the last couple weeks iv fairly gotten down again for some reason. I managed a few days away a couple of weeks ago. Was great when I was away but as soon as I returned home I became very low again. I have up days and down days but at the moment I would say down is beating up. I feel it hard to speak to people about things now because I feel myself trying to put a front on to family and friends because im suppose to be getting better. Im not enjoying my job. I only started 6 months ago iv never felt it’s been right but I can’t decide if that’s the depression speaking or if it’s not the job for me. I don’t seem to enjoy working with stock anymore and I hoped that when calving was finished and they were all out to grass I would re find my love for them but it just seem to continue to get me down you all no what stock is like it’s one problem after another but again I don’t no if that’s the depression speaking. Anyway just thought I’d share with someone and you lot seemed the best bet. Thanks.

Hi, ok so here it is from our experience, you are correct that no medication will give a quick fix, the meds are designed to deliver a bit of balance to a multitude of complicated issues, but our son was on Sertraline for around 4/5 months and it didnt work for him at all, he only made progress when the doc realised/accepted that progress should have been better and he could no longer simply say "give it some time". Our son moved onto 2 different meds (cant remember the name, my wife would but out shopping), these took a few weeks to kick in but it worked. Firstly, not one drug fits all, second I am convinced GPs treat you but dont make it their intention to find the solution for you in the same way as perhaps the Netherlands do, they wont prescribe meds without a mental health pro seeing you first and recommending specific meds that meet your needs - you must must go and make your case with your GP and any other support pros you have seen, tell them what your worst fears are, your worst thoughts etc and make them understand your needs. Sorry if you have already done this, but i must stress this has to be done. But the fact you are on here and aware things are not good means you have strength of mind to know and do something about it, as such you can and will beat this so please dont waste a day, go to the GP, go to your support people and absolutely tell someone close to you of how you are, doesnt have to be everyone, but share it with someone close who can help. And if you dont wnat to talk to someone close then feel free to call me on 07931 581381. My son now lives in Montreal, he controls and manages his mental health, he has just returned from a holiday in Japan and is getting married next year, 2 years ago he had given up, cleared his desk and was a whisper away from `solving` his problems, he is on meds but sees this as the same as someone who needs insulin. He says the difference between then and now is black and light and when it was black he never ever thought it would be possible to see light. It takes time. DM or call me if you want to chat, phone is always on. Nick

 

[Lili]

@TheScottishDairyman I agree with @CharcoalWally. First thing to do is go back to your GP explain how you feel, discuss and hopefully he can adjust or change the medication to suit. @Lazy Eric really sorry you feel so bad. Is there a choice of another GP in the same practice who might have different suggestions? Starting the day is sometimes the most difficult thing - it seems so much easier to just stay in bed and hope every thing wIll go away. Keep posting here - plenty of people ready to listen. Best wishes

 

[Old Tip]

Sorry to hear you are both still struggling, I know it didn’t help you but I have turned the corner and feel like my old self again. I’ve been back and fro to the docs a lot and saw a different doctor a couple of months ago. I was there because the antibiotics were not working I’d been prescribed for the chest infection. She check all the drugs I was on and changed one, asked if I could cope without another and altered the strength of the other two. This gave me s higher dose of Sertalin and a lower dose of Thyroxine and removed my pain relief for the injured leg. She also said some of the Sertalin tables are much better than other cheaper versions.
Anyway it’s done the trick for me and although I am still in a fair bit of pain all the time my mental health has improved drastically.

 

[Lili]

Sorry to hear you are both still struggling, I know it didn’t help you but I have turned the corner and feel like my old self again. I’ve been back and fro to the docs a lot and saw a different doctor a couple of months ago. I was there because the antibiotics were not working I’d been prescribed for the chest infection. She check all the drugs I was on and changed one, asked if I could cope without another and altered the strength of the other two. This gave me s higher dose of Sertalin and a lower dose of Thyroxine and removed my pain relief for the injured leg. She also said some of the Sertalin tables are much better than other cheaper versions.
Anyway it’s done the trick for me and although I am still in a fair bit of pain all the time my mental health has improved drastically.

That is really good news. Also really helpful for others to know that if the drugs don't seem to be working it can sometimes just be a matter of changing things about. I would think that if your mental health is good you will be in a much better place to cope with pain.

 

[Weasel]

Does your doctor tell you when their stopping giving you prescription meds? Or is it up to you to say you do/don't want them?

 

[CharcoalWally]

Does your doctor tell you when their stopping giving you prescription meds? Or is it up to you to say you do/don't want them?

I'm no medical expert, but I'd say these decisions should always be made by your doctor. You should only come off a course of medication when they give you the go ahead.

 

[Weasel]

I'm no medical expert, but I'd say these decisions should always be made by your doctor. You should only come off a course of medication when they give you the go ahead.

Aye but I mean if you don't want to come off them.

 

[CharcoalWally]

Aye but I mean if you don't want to come off them.

And your doctor wants you to come off them you mean?

You'd have to talk it through with your GP and explain why it bothers you, and that you don't feel ready yet. Then the ball's in your doctor's court - he/she might be more confident in you than you are yourself.

All you can do is listen and see what they say.

 

[CornishRanger]

@TheScottishDairyman, are you employed or on your own farm? Either way remember you do have other options IF you want to move on from stock work or even farming in general. Like others have said discuss things and the drugs with your doctor, and talk to a counsellor or someone close to you with a level head that can listen without judgement or prejudice, or speak to runny egg, though he may be busy putting his number on here! I get the impression you can't see the wood for the trees anymore for want of a better expression? Messaging if all well and good, but if you talk you don't have time to consider your reply, your thoughts are probably going to come out more honestly, and you may find that there is something you have been repressing emerges from the confusion. I may be well off, but I hope that something in my waffle will be of help, if only that a complete stranger is prepared to offer what little advice they can! All the best, hope that things improve soon

 

[Farmer1001]

@TheScottishDairyman, are you employed or on your own farm? Either way remember you do have other options IF you want to move on from stock work or even farming in general. Like others have said discuss things and the drugs with your doctor, and talk to a counsellor or someone close to you with a level head that can listen without judgement or prejudice, or speak to runny egg, though he may be busy putting his number on here! I get the impression you can't see the wood for the trees anymore for want of a better expression? Messaging if all well and good, but if you talk you don't have time to consider your reply, your thoughts are probably going to come out more honestly, and you may find that there is something you have been repressing emerges from the confusion. I may be well off, but I hope that something in my waffle will be of help, if only that a complete stranger is prepared to offer what little advice they can! All the best, hope that things improve soon

Never too busy to listen, I wouldn't wish what we went through on my worst of enemies, but that's in the past. The message has to be to those who feel they can't beat this, you can but you don't have to do it alone, it's not easy but it can and will be done and the rewards are unimaginable joy in having your life back - that's worth fighting for.

 

[Chasingmytail]

Not all meds help everyone I heard it on the radio a few weeks ago and some meds are just not right. Why not jump the GP and go for CBT or psychiatrist. As Ive said before GPs are only interested in prescribing a pill. They are General Practioners and some are just not switched onto mental problems. You may need a short sharp blast of a strong drug and then slowly come off it. If they don't work after a few weeks then I tend to believe they wont. The trouble is GPs will prescribe higher and higher doses without really knowing what they are doing. Ask to be referred and pay the fee if you feel it will help. I did my own prescription a few months ago which is gut and bowel related (you will have to scroll back) and still find its making a big difference. However, I have to accept I will never be brilliant and I am sensitive to my surroundings. Im ok to accept that I will always have a weakness but my feelings of utter doom and gloom with little up and go have subsided a lot. Also leant that we are all fragile and we have all mental weakness but some are able to recover while people like us are bruised. There is light.

 

[Chasingmytail]

How do people truly move on or finally let go of the questions they hold regarding a close loved one / friends suicide!

It has been over 2 years now since my best friend took his own life (He was only 21) when out gathering some sheep off his hill and there was no signs or reasoning to why to either myself or his family.....

I feel like I have moved on and yet randomly out the blue everything floods back all of a sudden and all those questions are left hanging there all over again, unanswered as ever!

That's perfectly natural, just remind yourself that is normal its human nature. to care and miss him, to ask questions and have flash backs. You'll never have an answer, young men are more likely to take their own lives they just flip. Why not google it Im sure there are a lot of studies done on this where young men just decide its time to end it. It will get better and the pain will subside but the bruise and hole left will always be there. You have to accept that it was his decision and its all those left behind who have to live with the lose.
https://www.independent.co.uk/voice...d-biggest-killer-in-uk-under-45-a7235766.html
http://thefederalist.com/2016/04/08/why-some-people-commit-suicide-without-warning/
https://www.menshealth.com/health/a19519415/suicide-rates-middle-age-men/

 

[Christoph1945]

Drugs is a funny thing! Not funny ha ha, but strange. Dependency can be something of a nightmare.

Some WWII prisoners of the Japanese swapped much needed food for a tobacco fix. Some would scoff at the drug dependant youth but stop their regular tobacco, alcohol, coffee, or tea fix and they would suffer from withdrawal symptoms; all be them minor. Adrenaline junkies also need their fix!

Many years ago, despite being under medical supervision, I had high dose Valium medication withdrawn and slipped into a somewhat nightmarish existence, where life became almost unbearable. My mental situation was made all the worse because I didn't know that I was undergoing withdrawal symptoms and had no way of understanding what was taking place in my disturbed mind.

If one is taking prescribed drugs it is essential that you talk the matter through with your gp and it is generally advisable that some drugs will require one to be weened off them over a period of time and close observation to be kept on your responses. Going cold turkey is no fun!

You partner, or companion, can also be of great assistance in assessing your progress to prescribed medication.

Stay safe, stay well, and remember that you would be missed greatly.

Chris

 

[Alicecow]

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-birmingham-43887636

 

[kathy wardle]

Hi all, ITV Westcountry is currently researching a feature regarding mental health in farming. We are interested in interviewing farmers based in the South West about their experiences, how isolating it can be, and the pressures of the industry. We would also be interested in hearing from farmers or their families who may have been affected by suicide.
Please contact [email protected]
Many thanks

 

[franklin]

We are interested in interviewing farmers based in the South West about their experiences, how isolating it can be, and the pressures of the industry.

Be anonymous, would it?

 

[Christoph1945]

Initially, perhaps mistakenly, I suspect that they are going to want people to open up and talk, (on camera), about the suicides of their friends or loved ones.

It may help matters if Kathy would outline exactly what their plan may be, and why!

Stay safe, stay well, and take care.

Chris

 

[Farmer Roy]

 

[Farmer Roy]

 

[Farmer Roy]