Dealing with depression - suicidal thoughts - Join the conversation (including helpline details)

[Christoph1945]

Had a bit of a wobble today think I have been suffering with anxiety and post natel depression after a difficult birth and ptsd from a farming accident., finally had enough of feeling like this and in floods of tears I finally plucked up the courage to ring the doctors for help. 30 minutes on the phone waiting in queue to be told I have to ring at 8am everyday to try and get an appointment well that was the end of that. I was addiiment I didn't want to go on pills and I have tried everything from weight loss and exercise to try and drag myself out of it but lately nothing seems to be working. I do not have time to sit on the phone every morning to try and get an appointment.

And there was me thinking that our little corner of TFF was so quiet and everyone was enjoying plain sailing. I am pleased that you decided to post but of course I am disappointed that you were unable to gain acces to your doctor for support, advice, and treatment..

Being male and ignorant of most farming matters there isn't a lot that I understand about pregnancy and agricultural matters but I do know that fasting and dieting can agrivate depression and that sharing our deepest psychological thoughts with a trusted friend, or adviser, can be a great help.

I do think that you need to talk with an understanding lady; who can really empathise with your ongoing situation and your recent experiences. Post natal imbalances, bereavement, post traumatic stress, and lack of understanding from others can all weigh heavily upon us and please belive me the load 'can' be lightened.

 

[holwellcourtfarm]

Had a bit of a wobble today think I have been suffering with anxiety and post natel depression after a difficult birth and ptsd from a farming accident., finally had enough of feeling like this and in floods of tears I finally plucked up the courage to ring the doctors for help. 30 minutes on the phone waiting in queue to be told I have to ring at 8am everyday to try and get an appointment well that was the end of that. I was addiiment I didn't want to go on pills and I have tried everything from weight loss and exercise to try and drag myself out of it but lately nothing seems to be working. I do not have time to sit on the phone every morning to try and get an appointment.

Post-natal depression is more common than people think and can vary from a touch of 'baby blues' to full-on mental collapse. It's no shame to ask for help and that help should be readily provided now you've asked. Please stick with it.

Does your partner know how you feel?

 

[holwellcourtfarm]

Had a bit of a wobble today think I have been suffering with anxiety and post natel depression after a difficult birth and ptsd from a farming accident., finally had enough of feeling like this and in floods of tears I finally plucked up the courage to ring the doctors for help. 30 minutes on the phone waiting in queue to be told I have to ring at 8am everyday to try and get an appointment well that was the end of that. I was addiiment I didn't want to go on pills and I have tried everything from weight loss and exercise to try and drag myself out of it but lately nothing seems to be working. I do not have time to sit on the phone every morning to try and get an appointment.

Mrs Holwell just suggested that your Midwife and/or health visitor may be able to provide a referral to help for depression if your doctor is struggling.

 

[Cowslip]

Mrs Holwell just suggested that your Midwife and/or health visitor may be able to provide a referral to help for depression if your doctor is struggling.

I had our son 4 years ago the trouble was at the time I hid my problems and feelings, and only now looking back it was the beginning of alot of the problems I have now.

 

[Cowslip]

Post-natal depression is more common than people think and can vary from a touch of 'baby blues' to full-on mental collapse. It's no shame to ask for help and that help should be readily provided now you've asked. Please stick with it.

Does your partner know how you feel?

He knows i have problems but won't discuss them with me he also has similar problems but we have completely different ways of dealing with things.

 

[Cowslip]

Brilliant that you reached for help. Not so brilliant response. When you call tomorrow would you feel brave enough just to say "I am desperate for help to the receptionist"?

You have taken the biggest step.

I was in tears and said it had taken me a long time to pluck up the courage but was told to keep ringing at 8 am. I just wanted to book an early appointment for any day in the next few weeks so it didn't interfere with work. Tomorrow and Wednesday are out the equation now due to work so will have to wait for the next wet day.

 

[Kiwi Pete]

I was in tears and said it had taken me a long time to pluck up the courage but was told to keep ringing at 8 am. I just wanted to book an early appointment for any day in the next few weeks so it didn't interfere with work. Tomorrow and Wednesday are out the equation now due to work so will have to wait for the next wet day.

Keep trying - even knowing that you are keeping on trying is a small positive

(even so, I'm peevish at the response you got!! Been there too)

 

[wrenbird]

This might sound a bit left field, but, there’s a chap lives near us, mid-forties, long-term condition that is slowly only going to get worse, even he couldn’t get an appointment when he needed one.
His wife was so exasperated with this, she suggested writing a letter to the GP, so he did, explaining why he really needed an appointment ASAP.
They hand delivered it to the surgery, and it worked! He had a face to face appointment within days.
I have in the past written a note to take with me to an appointment, when you are feeling so low that communicating exactly how you feel is a struggle, it was a help.

 

[Christoph1945]

This might sound a bit left field, but, there’s a chap lives near us, mid-forties, long-term condition that is slowly going only get worse, even he couldn’t get an appointment when he needed one.
His wife was so exasperated with this she suggested writing a letter to the GP, so he did, explaining why he really needed an appointment ASAP.
They hand delivered to the surgery, and it worked! He had a face to face appointment within days.
I have in the past written a note to take with me to an appointment, when you are feeling so low that communicating exactly how you feel is a struggle, it was a help.

That, to me, sounds like a superb idea and something many of us could take to heart.; how often have we visited our gp only to get side-tracked in conversation and walk away without resolving our deeper needs.

 

[Lili]

Have a look at this. While youre waiting to get your GP appointment, there will be somebody you can talk to. Dont struggle on your own

Hub of Hope - Mental Health Support Network provided by Chasing the Stigma

Chasing the Stigma (CTS) has launched the Hub of Hope - a national mental health database, bringing help and support together in one place, with a focus on grassroots organisations.

hubofhope.co.uk

What is the Hub of Hope?

The Hub of Hope is the UK’s leading mental health support database. It is provided by national mental health charity, Chasing the Stigma, and brings local, national, peer, community, charity, private and NHS mental health support and services together in one place for the first time.

Initially a simple spreadsheet of local services populated at the kitchen table of Chasing the Stigma founder and CEO, Jake Mills, the Hub of Hope was born out of Jake’s own lived experience of extreme mental and emotional distress. He witnessed first-hand the difficulties in finding relevant, accessible and nearby support when it was most needed and decided to take action.

To date, the Hub of Hope has directed hundreds of thousands of people to life-changing and even life-saving support and it is now the UK’s go-to mental health support signposting tool, with thousands of local, regional and national support groups and services listed.

 

[Dairyfarmerswife]

I was in tears and said it had taken me a long time to pluck up the courage but was told to keep ringing at 8 am. I just wanted to book an early appointment for any day in the next few weeks so it didn't interfere with work. Tomorrow and Wednesday are out the equation now due to work so will have to wait for the next wet day.

I lurk in here occasionally and I'm sorry you are having difficulty getting a doctor's appointment. The receptionist at our doctors is like a bulldog. I discovered this week that with the NHS app I can book a telephone consultation without having to run the gauntlet of the receptionist. It was very simple to sign up and I didn't need my NHS number, just name and date of birth. I hope this might help.

 

[wrenbird]

Sometimes I have found it’s just helpful to write down how I am feeling. When anxiety and worry are threatening to overwhelm, it can almost make you pause and take a breath mentally. The thoughts going round and round in your head like a dog chasing it’s tail are hard to rein in, so I find thinking how I am going to capture them and commit them to paper is sometimes a help in itself.

 

[Kiwi Pete]

Sometimes I have found it’s just helpful to write down how I am feeling. When anxiety and worry are threatening to overwhelm, it can almost make you pause and take a breath mentally. The thoughts going round and round in your head like a dog chasing it’s tail are hard to rein in, so I find thinking how I am going to capture them and commit them to paper is sometimes a help in itself.

Sometimes you just have to - it's reallt hard to "kick it out" if you can't think what "it" actually is at the moment?

I cannot keep a diary going for the life of me, but I do have a notebook beside the bed. Sometimes I wake up with thoughts bouncing around, and the only way to get peace in the wee small hours is to commit it to paper.

I almost always throw these notes away, like a little ceremony, when I'm able to rationally process it

 

[teslacoils]

At the end of the day,you can't beat just having a chat with a real person, or group of people. The number of folk who will be in the same boat is not small, as can be seen by the numbers of antidepressants prescribed in England.

 

[Texel Tup]

Sometimes you just have to - it's reallt hard to "kick it out" if you can't think what "it" actually is at the moment?

I cannot keep a diary going for the life of me, but I do have a notebook beside the bed. Sometimes I wake up with thoughts bouncing around, and the only way to get peace in the wee small hours is to commit it to paper.

I almost always throw these notes away, like a little ceremony, when I'm able to rationally process it

And this will lead to 'acceptance' of the situation, not necessarily accepting what troubles us, but accepting that there's a hill in front of us. Well said, what ever route we chose, it's the first step to self awareness and with luck, self-medication …….. I've never really solved what's been wrong and by my own efforts, but it's better than the slump.

 

[GrannyAching]

This might sound a bit left field, but, there’s a chap lives near us, mid-forties, long-term condition that is slowly only going to get worse, even he couldn’t get an appointment when he needed one.
His wife was so exasperated with this, she suggested writing a letter to the GP, so he did, explaining why he really needed an appointment ASAP.
They hand delivered it to the surgery, and it worked! He had a face to face appointment within days.
I have in the past written a note to take with me to an appointment, when you are feeling so low that communicating exactly how you feel is a struggle, it was a help.

Excellent suggestions. Taking at least notes into an appointment is really useful for lots of illnesses.

 

[Christoph1945]

Sometimes I have found it’s just helpful to write down how I am feeling. When anxiety and worry are threatening to overwhelm, it can almost make you pause and take a breath mentally. The thoughts going round and round in your head like a dog chasing it’s tail are hard to rein in, so I find thinking how I am going to capture them and commit them to paper is sometimes a help in itself.

I have, somewhere in the deep recesses of my memories, a memory of a christian group that encouraged members to write down the many things that were troubling them and the papers were then burned. without anyone reading them.

 

[Kiwi Pete]

And this will lead to 'acceptance' of the situation, not necessarily accepting what troubles us, but accepting that there's a hill in front of us. Well said, what ever route we chose, it's the first step to self awareness and with luck, self-medication …….. I've never really solved what's been wrong and by my own efforts, but it's better than the slump.

It just gives me a little direction, I guess?
Otherwise I seem to stay in 'an uncontrollable flat spin' and it leads me to zero sleep, or at best very broken sleep... suppose it's a bit like yelling at the dog next door to shut up, whether it does or not at least I yelled. Doing something is better than nothing?

@teslacoils is on the money, people are good, just so long as they don't trivialise or try to solve the problem - sometimes you just want to be heard, not "fixed"

 

[Christoph1945]

It just gives me a little direction, I guess?
Otherwise I seem to stay in 'an uncontrollable flat spin' and it leads me to zero sleep, or at best very broken sleep... suppose it's a bit like yelling at the dog next door to shut up, whether it does or not at least I yelled. Doing something is better than nothing?

@teslacoils is on the money, people are good, just so long as they don't trivialise or try to solve the problem - sometimes you just want to be heard, not "fixed"

I have come across a general opinion that women want to be heard but men want to fix!

 

[holwellcourtfarm]

It just gives me a little direction, I guess?
Otherwise I seem to stay in 'an uncontrollable flat spin' and it leads me to zero sleep, or at best very broken sleep... suppose it's a bit like yelling at the dog next door to shut up, whether it does or not at least I yelled. Doing something is better than nothing?

@teslacoils is on the money, people are good, just so long as they don't trivialise or try to solve the problem - sometimes you just want to be heard, not "fixed"

That's the classic male problem, isn't it? Term a mate your troubles and he starts trying to offer solutions. Tell a female friend and their first response is empathy.

Both have their place but, especially with mental health issues, you can only offer appropriate solutions if you fully understand the issues (and very few do).