Dealing with depression - suicidal thoughts - Join the conversation (including helpline details)

holwellcourtfarm

Member
Livestock Farmer
I might, tbh it's something I have been mulling over for a while. If we had a better farm with better facilities than we have then sure, it would feel better. We'll see what summer brings anyway I guess. Parents always say we have to work we with what we have, which I guess is true, but it's so frustrating. I'm thinking at some point I may just move abroad and farm elsewhere or even just do another job entirely. But there's this innate fear of disappointing people, in my head, ik my parents would be really disappointed in me if I didn't take over the farm or the business, but if its not what I want then I shouldn't be doing it. You have to want something to truly give it your all.
PLEASE do your best to learn not to be held to a course of action that does not suit you by your worry about what others will think. Far too many folk born in farming stay because of what they think their family will think if they leave instead of following their hearts. It's corrosive for the mind.

If you need a change for your mental health and they have issues with that then that's their problem, not yours.

It is hard for many of us to give up the farming life completely though....
 

Crofter64

Member
Livestock Farmer
Location
Quebec, Canada
Thanks for the replies guys. If I am really honest with myself there are days I despise farming, but overall it is a part of me and something I want to do. I wish things were different, but I guess it's in our hands to make that so. Had a haunting dream last night that I could no longer farm, that I had to go live in a town. It was horrific, suddenly everything I have now was ripped away and all I could do was stare at 4 walls. I need to make do with what I have. Ik many young people want to farm and can't for various reasons. I've been given this opportunity and I need to make the best of it really :)
when you get frustrated with your brothers is it because of what you think they should be doing, and you tell them so, and they don’t do it/ don’t do it well enough or on time, or have you sat down as a family/ farm business and established goals with ways and means?
 

waterbuffalofarmer

Member
Livestock Farmer
Location
Penzance
when you get frustrated with your brothers is it because of what you think they should be doing, and you tell them so, and they don’t do it/ don’t do it well enough or on time, or have you sat down as a family/ farm business and established goals with ways and means?
It's the fact that well. OK firstly we did have a few unofficial meetings, as it were, to arrange timings of going out and such and we were all in agreement. It started off OK, but then it slipped back as I don't know really, it just went back to what it was before. It's a lack of drive I think a lack of motivation and a lack of forethought. The worst thing is because of my elder brother it impacts the rest of us. I guess we just need to try harder really.
 

Greenbeast

Member
Location
East Sussex
Since I stopped drinking, went to bed early, are sensibly and went back to the gym I have never been so poorly! I'm hoping it's the combination of rapid lifestyle adjustments and "stranger germs". Until then, I'll be under this blanket drinking hot lemon drink.
I think you'll come right and be much the better for it. I miss my weight lifting, but I do look after my sleep where at all possible. 'Luckily' I'm quite poor right now, so alcohol isn't an option!
 
There is a difference I think, between a sugar low and genuine hunger. As I have said in other posts elsewhere if prehistoric man had genuine hunger most of the time, given the relative scarcity of food, we would surely not be here at all.

The availability and prevalence of starch and simple carbs in virtually every food we eat I believe must be the reason so many of us are 'hungry' all the time. The most highly processed, the more the stuff has been doctored and the easier it is to digest and absorb. I suspect I am not alone when I say I could probably eat 3000 calories worth of McDonalds with ease but I would be feeling hungry again within 2 hours- it just doesn't seem to satisfy for long.

That said, I can often go all day on just breakfast and skip lunch until around 4pm though this is probably due to the peculiar work routine I have more than anything.

I'm totally without focus at the minute, coming to terms with the realisation I might never get into med school. I've been working largely part time until now but desperately need to find a job for the next 10 months or so to keep my occupied. I don't think I've genuinely been tried out for a long time so my sleep habits have been very poor. Being at college was a good chance to refocus and I really enjoyed the challenge but that is completed now. Need something to give me the rattle of my own money in my pocket and get the ducks in a row for reapplying in the coming year or two, or perhaps taking time to do some DIY on the house and think about alternative futures.
 

choochter

Member
Location
aberdeenshire
There is a difference I think, between a sugar low and genuine hunger. As I have said in other posts elsewhere if prehistoric man had genuine hunger most of the time, given the relative scarcity of food, we would surely not be here at all.

The availability and prevalence of starch and simple carbs in virtually every food we eat I believe must be the reason so many of us are 'hungry' all the time. The most highly processed, the more the stuff has been doctored and the easier it is to digest and absorb. I suspect I am not alone when I say I could probably eat 3000 calories worth of McDonalds with ease but I would be feeling hungry again within 2 hours- it just doesn't seem to satisfy for long.

That said, I can often go all day on just breakfast and skip lunch until around 4pm though this is probably due to the peculiar work routine I have more than anything.

I'm totally without focus at the minute, coming to terms with the realisation I might never get into med school. I've been working largely part time until now but desperately need to find a job for the next 10 months or so to keep my occupied. I don't think I've genuinely been tried out for a long time so my sleep habits have been very poor. Being at college was a good chance to refocus and I really enjoyed the challenge but that is completed now. Need something to give me the rattle of my own money in my pocket and get the ducks in a row for reapplying in the coming year or two, or perhaps taking time to do some DIY on the house and think about alternative futures.
Don't give up yet, my son spent a year as an auxilliary nurse while reapplying for med school despite having all the qualifications necessary. Time well spent, as he learned a lot in lots of different ways. And he is now a hospital doc.
 
Don't give up yet, my son spent a year as an auxilliary nurse while reapplying for med school despite having all the qualifications necessary. Time well spent, as he learned a lot in lots of different ways. And he is now a hospital doc.

I am planning to do that, starting next winter I think. I applied for two positions recently actually but was rejected for both.
 

milkloss

Member
Livestock Farmer
Location
East Sussex
I am not 100% sure but given my background I think being a rural GP would be right up my street- knowledge of rural life/people due to my agronomy background.

I wish you well in that endeavour. My wife and I have had a fair few medical issues over the last year or two and have noticed one big problem in the system. There is a lack of proffesionals' willing to say it like it is or, at the very least, admit they just don't know the answer. You don't suffer from that problem........ in a good way!
 

choochter

Member
Location
aberdeenshire
I am planning to do that, starting next winter I think. I applied for two positions recently actually but was rejected for both.
Keep trying. Don't wait for next winter. Get something now.
Don't know what else you are doing but try and get an auxiliary nurse job now, even part time.

It will look very good on your cv, shows commitment and gives you lots of direct experience that will stand you in good stead later on.
 

SFI - What % were you taking out of production?

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Red Tractor drops launch of green farming scheme amid anger from farmers

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As reported in Independent


quote: “Red Tractor has confirmed it is dropping plans to launch its green farming assurance standard in April“

read the TFF thread here: https://thefarmingforum.co.uk/index.php?threads/gfc-was-to-go-ahead-now-not-going-ahead.405234/
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