Dealing with depression - suicidal thoughts - Join the conversation (including helpline details)

[Christoph1945]

There is an interesting Jewish group of thinkers who believe that wheat was the forbidden fruit written of Genesis and when one considers what followed in the story, it would make a lot of sense.

Also, after accepting the bread at the last supper, Judas over reacted to a slight from Christ ("haven't you got something to be about") and went out and betrayed his master.

The university of Manchester did some research on a link between diet and criminality and we all know that many crimes are committed under the influence of alcohol.

Thanks for the heads up on the probiotics links though, I will follow that up. Mind you if it makes me vault five barred gates and dance in the mud like the farmer in the tv ad, I may eventually pass on that one!

 

[Rossymons]

I'm tired, downbeat, fed up and miserable.

There. I've bloody said it now rather than pretending the opposite.

 

[Wink]

I'm tired, downbeat, fed up and miserable.

There. I've bloody said it now rather than pretending the opposite.

If you wanna chat it out mate send me a pm, nothing worse than not having anyone to talk too to get it off your chest and sometimes may help with someone not close. We vaguely know each other from uni day's. If not that's cool but I'm sure there are many that will listen if you want too. All the best!

 

[Friesianfan]

I'm tired, downbeat, fed up and miserable.

There. I've bloody said it now rather than pretending the opposite.

You've had a tough few months. We're all here if you want a chat

 

[Rossymons]

It just seems incessant at the moment. I've had a day off milking today - go to check heifers on off ground and 1 is stuck in a ditch, another has died in the ditch and another has died. Fantastic

I had a budget meeting last week and I thought things were looking good. Turns out not so looking towards the winter so a hold on plans for now.

So I'm doing all this work and there's no more in it for me. So what's the point? So then I start looking at jobs and what is the way out.

I wish I could just put pause on everything and catch my breath

 

[Friesianfan]

It just seems incessant at the moment. I've had a day off milking today - go to check heifers on off ground and 1 is stuck in a ditch, another has died in the ditch and another has died. Fantastic

I had a budget meeting last week and I thought things were looking good. Turns out not so looking towards the winter so a hold on plans for now.

So I'm doing all this work and there's no more in it for me. So what's the point? So then I start looking at jobs and what is the way out.

I wish I could just put pause on everything and catch my breath

I know how you feel. Just pressing pause for a few days would be fantastic but unfortunately the cows still need your attention. Try not to beat yourself up about the heifers ( I need to take my own advise) it's all part of farming and it happens to all of us.

 

[Rossymons]

The hard part is getting my head up ready for calving - this is meant to be my down time and I'm already exhausted and I've got 160+ calving soon. I've got these jobs and those jobs to be getting done before then and then anything else that rocks up in meantime.

And I just can't be bothered for any of it. I can't keep bucking myself up when I'm low. It's tiring doing that all the time.

 

[Lili]

I think we all feel sometimes that we are on a roundabout going too fast and just wish we could get off and have a few days peace and quiet away from our troubles. Very sorry to hear you are having a rough time at the moment. Keep posting. Best wishes

 

[Friesianfan]

The hard part is getting my head up ready for calving - this is meant to be my down time and I'm already exhausted and I've got 160+ calving soon. I've got these jobs and those jobs to be getting done before then and then anything else that rocks up in meantime.

And I just can't be bothered for any of it. I can't keep bucking myself up when I'm low. It's tiring doing that all the time.

I think down time is a myth in farming! Always something to be doing. As my wife says " you'll get through like you always do". Looking back she's right! Don't buy anymore cows, big isn't beautiful! I'm going to be milking less cows this winter. Why work 80 hours a week to pay the tax man if you feel like sh!t? Be easier on yourself

 

[Farmer1001]

I'm tired, downbeat, fed up and miserable.

There. I've bloody said it now rather than pretending the opposite.

Its a typical situation with farming, we find ourselves chasing it rather than controlling it as things are never quite in our control, milk price rises for just long enough to nearly get things on track and then the downward cycle starts again. We see more mental health issues in dairy than most other sectors and I really blame the contract culture for being part of this simply because most dairy farmers are price takers with no choice - the stress of investing all that time, money and effort and working your arse off with no idea what you will get paid other than the next month (at best) is not healthy and needs to be faced up to. The most important thing we can try to do at this stage is try (I know thats easy said) not to take it personal, try to slow down and step off the carousel for the day when you can - it can be done. A neighbour of mine told me things changed when he stopped pushing things to breaking point inc cows, machinery, staff and family and as a result they are better off with less turnover but same profit and no stress. I am sure the same doesnt apply to all but dont push yourself beyond your limit - again easy said.

 

[Christoph1945]

I have recently been reading one of the TB threads and must confess that I hadn't realised just what is involved when TB starts to show up in your cattle.

On top of all that you mention above; TB must be a death blow to any dairy farmer and I am hesitant to say that I "understand" just how a dairy farmer must feel when given the news that his cattle have tested positive for TB.

No; disregard that last statement, I couldn't possibly "understand" could I? But there are people in here and all around who have been there them selves and do understand implicitly.

 

[Friesianfan]

How are you doing @Rossymons ?

 

[Rossymons]

How are you doing @Rossymons ?

Bit improved. I've got physio booked as I've been walking with tight muscles for too long.

At the moment I'm busy planning my cousin's wedding. The marquee turned up today and was in the wrong place so had to be moved - of course boss man went off with the pin pullers so they fell behind a couple hours. Quite a stressful morning as they turned up 24 hours early as I was halfway through milking.

Apprentice ran out the tractor out of diesel - a first in 6 years of hiring an apprentice

He goes on holiday for a fortnight next week which I'll be glad of. He's a good kid but it'll be nice to by myself for a few days to get my head straight and go at my own pace which family have said is still twice as quick as everyone else

Seeing that 40+ hfrs are drawing udder did make me smile earlier even though I then remembered I'll be spending all week ferrying them back.

The milkers are proving a pain as I'm really struggling to get the SCC down and we've had weird FPD readings and nothing I do is working at all. Really dragging me down it is

 

[Farmer1001]

Bit improved. I've got physio booked as I've been walking with tight muscles for too long.

At the moment I'm busy planning my cousin's wedding. The marquee turned up today and was in the wrong place so had to be moved - of course boss man went off with the pin pullers so they fell behind a couple hours. Quite a stressful morning as they turned up 24 hours early as I was halfway through milking.

Apprentice ran out the tractor out of diesel - a first in 6 years of hiring an apprentice

He goes on holiday for a fortnight next week which I'll be glad of. He's a good kid but it'll be nice to by myself for a few days to get my head straight and go at my own pace which family have said is still twice as quick as everyone else

Seeing that 40+ hfrs are drawing udder did make me smile earlier even though I then remembered I'll be spending all week ferrying them back.

The milkers are proving a pain as I'm really struggling to get the SCC down and we've had weird FPD readings and nothing I do is working at all. Really dragging me down it is

Ross do you have many family members are involved?

 

[Rossymons]

Ross do you have many family members are involved?

I'm the baby of 4 but the only one interested in farming. The others aren't in the partnership and have gone on to other things in life.

 

[BobGreen]

Pretty much the same, we're very close but not together, i think the anxiety from the pills is holding her back, we had a wobble the other day when we went to a music concert, mostly down to her deciding to drink alot and thus, it put her back to how she was for a small time, but patched it up again now, life seems to be full of suprises at the moment so just taking it as it comes , there's more good than bad so keep smiling

I spoke too soon !
After standing by her while she's been in a very dark place I've now been told that we have to go separate ways
She will love me forever but can't be with me anymore !
One day I might understand this woman's thinking

 

[Friesianfan]

Bit improved. I've got physio booked as I've been walking with tight muscles for too long.

At the moment I'm busy planning my cousin's wedding. The marquee turned up today and was in the wrong place so had to be moved - of course boss man went off with the pin pullers so they fell behind a couple hours. Quite a stressful morning as they turned up 24 hours early as I was halfway through milking.

Apprentice ran out the tractor out of diesel - a first in 6 years of hiring an apprentice

He goes on holiday for a fortnight next week which I'll be glad of. He's a good kid but it'll be nice to by myself for a few days to get my head straight and go at my own pace which family have said is still twice as quick as everyone else

Seeing that 40+ hfrs are drawing udder did make me smile earlier even though I then remembered I'll be spending all week ferrying them back.

The milkers are proving a pain as I'm really struggling to get the SCC down and we've had weird FPD readings and nothing I do is working at all. Really dragging me down it is

That's often the problem, lots of little things build up to seem like a mountain that you can't be bothered to climb. Keep chipping away and you'll get through. Funny time if the year for fpd s they'll settle down.

 

[Rossymons]

That's often the problem, lots of little things build up to seem like a mountain that you can't be bothered to climb. Keep chipping away and you'll get through. Funny time if the year for fpd s they'll settle down.

Funny how things can turnaround...

 

[Friesianfan]

Funny how things can turnaround...

What do you mean?

 

[Rossymons]

What do you mean?

I've just had a phonecall from someone I've been desperate to hear from...watch this space...