Dealing with depression - suicidal thoughts - Join the conversation (including helpline details)

[BobGreen]

Made a massive decision tonight about getting over the woman who finished our relationship. I read all our messages to each other, didn't count them but I guess we'll over a thousand !
Then I pressed delete !
Now I can't make myself down by keeping re reading them. It was starting to get obsessive and could see it making me on that journey to a dark place
I felt sad to do it but now slightly better as I know I can no longer keep going over things
Funniest thing though was 2 minutes after I pressed delete she sent a text asking how I was !!!
I haven't replied

 

[Alicecow]

Made a massive decision tonight about getting over the woman who finished our relationship. I read all our messages to each other, didn't count them but I guess we'll over a thousand !
Then I pressed delete !
Now I can't make myself down by keeping re reading them. It was starting to get obsessive and could see it making me on that journey to a dark place
I felt sad to do it but now slightly better as I know I can no longer keep going over things
Funniest thing though was 2 minutes after I pressed delete she sent a text asking how I was !!!
I haven't replied

Well done. It's a difficult thing to do, but sometimes you just have to.

 

[Alicecow]

@CopperBeech
Take no notice of the troll with a fetish for toilets either. Next he'll be demanding to know which hand people wipe with
He's just out to upset people. On his "what to wear for an interview" thread he says something like he decided not to take the job, his attitude makes me wonder if he was actually offered it. At any rate, despite knowing everything, and seemingly having done many more jobs than the rest of us , 12 months later he still doesn't appear to have progressed at all.

You, on the other hand, are ok

 

[Storeman]

Made a massive decision tonight about getting over the woman who finished our relationship. I read all our messages to each other, didn't count them but I guess we'll over a thousand !
Then I pressed delete !
Now I can't make myself down by keeping re reading them. It was starting to get obsessive and could see it making me on that journey to a dark place
I felt sad to do it but now slightly better as I know I can no longer keep going over things
Funniest thing though was 2 minutes after I pressed delete she sent a text asking how I was !!!
I haven't replied

Wow, that is a huge step to make. Well done. I hope that the future is much brighter for you

 

[waterbuffalofarmer]

Made a massive decision tonight about getting over the woman who finished our relationship. I read all our messages to each other, didn't count them but I guess we'll over a thousand !
Then I pressed delete !
Now I can't make myself down by keeping re reading them. It was starting to get obsessive and could see it making me on that journey to a dark place
I felt sad to do it but now slightly better as I know I can no longer keep going over things
Funniest thing though was 2 minutes after I pressed delete she sent a text asking how I was !!!
I haven't replied

A hearty pat on the back for doing that mate. It's difficult, I myself have been there, it will take time to come out of those feelings too. Maybe also delete and block her number? So she can't contact you and you don't have to read anything or think about her. Again it's an even bigger step for that, but worth it in the long run. My brother's are going through the mill ATM, am worried about them, because of ended/bad relationships. If you wanna talk about stuff we are all here to listen and to help

 

[Pieces_of_Eight]

Maybe also delete and block her number? So she can't contact you and you don't have to read anything or think about her.

It can be enormously empowering just to delete someone's number, a bit like closing the door then changing the locks. Also stops you being tempted to text them when you've had 7 pints and 9 whiskies.

I haven't been on Facebook for four years, because of a small handful of individuals that I just needed to get away from. It means I have lost touch with some real friends who live abroad and I dont get to see the photos of my brother's and cousins' kids as they grow up. Sometimes think about going back on facebook, and unfriending/blocking everyone apart from the few that I actually want to stay friends with.

 

[Pilgrimmick]

Made a massive decision tonight about getting over the woman who finished our relationship. I read all our messages to each other, didn't count them but I guess we'll over a thousand !
Then I pressed delete !
Now I can't make myself down by keeping re reading them. It was starting to get obsessive and could see it making me on that journey to a dark place
I felt sad to do it but now slightly better as I know I can no longer keep going over things
Funniest thing though was 2 minutes after I pressed delete she sent a text asking how I was !!!
I haven't replied

Well done, a simple but very difficult step. Each step is one further away from the past and closer to where you are going. @waterbuffalofarmer made a good point about blocking her number.
Glad you are feeling slightly better already. It was a good move.

 

[waterbuffalofarmer]

It can be enormously empowering just to delete someone's number, a bit like closing the door then changing the locks. Also stops you being tempted to text them when you've had 7 pints and 9 whiskies.

I haven't been on Facebook for four years, because of a small handful of individuals that I just needed to get away from. It means I have lost touch with some real friends who live abroad and I dont get to see the photos of my brother's and cousins' kids as they grow up. Sometimes think about going back on facebook, and unfriending/blocking everyone apart from the few that I actually want to stay friends with.

You should definitely do that you know, don't let them decide on you being on FB or not. If you wanna chat with real friends get rid of those who are not your real friends. I had a revelation today, some things hitting home. I belonged to a group, my brother's, who my ex BF is a member of. I have been spending a lot of time talking to his best mate (we are good friends he's a lovely guy ) and my ex BF got jealous (I presume) I think he thinks I'm taking his best friend away from him, so he kicked me from the group, without my brother's permission (online gaming group) my brother added me again, but if it happens again my brother said he will have to explain himself and his actions to think I was even in love with this guy, how petty can you get? There may be backlash but always good to take stuff in your stride, after all it's their problem not yours. Don't let them make you feel you're the bad guy, because in actual fact you have done nothing wrong, you're the victim. So many people who are the victims are afraid of thinking themselves as that, they think it makes them feel weak. Let me tell you admittance of being the abused/victim is the strongest thing to do. To admit you are the one picked on is being strong, that enables you to become even stronger and wiser of how to make sure it never happens again. Decide your own future don't let those bad people effect it

 

[Pieces_of_Eight]

@CopperBeech

Did see your posts on Twitter, must be soul destroying to bring animals into the world and raise them, only for them to be killed by the mindless actions of the very people you are trying to produce food for.

 

[Christoph1945]

Been off the radar for four or five days. Had my self a ride in a big NHS taxi, warm bed board and room service in one of their modern buildings, and have been discharged with a large bag of NHS Dolly Mixtures. Not all bad though; found it to be a superb learning experience; if not a bit off putting!

Bob, good luck with your progress and as one who has personally loved and lost, you have my considered admiration for your determined decision. In death, relationships, and general loss, letting go can be one of the most difficult of things to do. Not to let go can ruin and spoil a great many future plans and relationships but then you and most of the guys and gals in here already know that.

 

[Christoph1945]

Copper Beech,

As an agricultural ignorant townie, outside looking in, I often despair at the problems caused for you good folk, as you try to make a reasonable living.

Having read your post and also some in other threads, I got to wondering if the nosy reporters of perceived farm problems could be recruited to assist in resolving some real problems; such as dogs, thieves, and trespassers, to name but three.

 

[Alicecow]

Welcome back @Christoph1945 , hope your taxi ride wasn't too scary and that you are back on form again.

 

[BobGreen]

A hearty pat on the back for doing that mate. It's difficult, I myself have been there, it will take time to come out of those feelings too. Maybe also delete and block her number? So she can't contact you and you don't have to read anything or think about her. Again it's an even bigger step for that, but worth it in the long run. My brother's are going through the mill ATM, am worried about them, because of ended/bad relationships. If you wanna talk about stuff we are all here to listen and to help

It was difficult to decide to delete all our messages. I didn't count them but must have been well over a thousand. Quite a lot since we parted and I have tried to talk her round. Nearly did it as well
I realised it was doing me no good sat at night keep reading them and it did lift a weight when I pressed delete and there was no going back !
I won't be blocking her though, we are still close and there is a bond of sorts between us even though she broke my heart.
Keeping busy is the best cure. I have learnt a valuable lesson that constant communication in a relationship is important. It was difficult with her suffering severe depression last winter but I stuck by her but we drifted apart just as she was getting better

 

[startinghandle]

yes me and my brother are about to be evicted from our council holding but most of the land has already gone, our next door neighbour reported us for being understocked and not keeping the fences up to standard and now he has had our 4 bottom fields about 30 acres and that is the reason he did it and another 30 acres has been let to someone about 20 miles away we have been here nearly 55 years my late parents were here first. I have had depression over it and the police have taken my gun away there is a council bungalow available in the village one mile away but no animals are allowed so our 12 year old cat and my dog will have to be put down
there is a fence put around the house and buildings as the council will sell it off with 6 acres
I am feeling suicidal over it but I have just finished my first book

 

[spin cycle]

welcome to the forum....albeit in unfortunate circumstances....here you'll hopefully find some advice/comfort

@llamados...thread better in depression sticky?

 

[Suffolk Serf]

Contact the FCN helpline NOW.

03000 111 999

They are there to help.

 

[milkloss]

welcome to the forum....albeit in unfortunate circumstances....here you'll hopefully find some advice/comfort

@llamados...thread better in depression sticky?

@llamedos

 

[Chae1]

yes me and my brother are about to be evicted from our council holding but most of the land has already gone, our next door neighbour reported us for being understocked and not keeping the fences up to standard and now he has had our 4 bottom fields about 30 acres and that is the reason he did it and another 30 acres has been let to someone about 20 miles away we have been here nearly 55 years my late parents were here first. I have had depression over it and the police have taken my gun away there is a council bungalow available in the village one mile away but no animals are allowed so our 12 year old cat and my dog will have to be put down
there is a fence put around the house and buildings as the council will sell it off with 6 acres
I am feeling suicidal over it but I have just finished my first book

What's your book about?

 

[startinghandle]

What's your book about?

my book is a wartime story but it starts in 1973 then goes back to 1936 and leads up into the war it is about US aircrew in England that is all I will say

 

[gone up the hill]

yes me and my brother are about to be evicted from our council holding but most of the land has already gone, our next door neighbour reported us for being understocked and not keeping the fences up to standard and now he has had our 4 bottom fields about 30 acres and that is the reason he did it and another 30 acres has been let to someone about 20 miles away we have been here nearly 55 years my late parents were here first. I have had depression over it and the police have taken my gun away there is a council bungalow available in the village one mile away but no animals are allowed so our 12 year old cat and my dog will have to be put down
there is a fence put around the house and buildings as the council will sell it off with 6 acres
I am feeling suicidal over it but I have just finished my first book

Your cat and dog will NOT need to be put down if you move into that bungalow!

Other alternatives out there for sure, like asking Friends or the FCN who no doubt will know someone that can give your pets a temp home ( and it could well be someone that is lonely and would love to have your animals to look after for company until you get yourselves back on an even keel and in that time im sure you will be able to go and see them on a regular basis.