diary of a comedy sheep farm

[yellowbelly]

Don't be lazy. Make yourself a nice cup.of hot chocolate, sit down in a comfy chair and start at the beginning. See you in a couple of days.

...and remember to take notes @noagain 'cos there'll be a test later 👩‍🎓👨‍

 

[clod hopper]

I'm sorry I haven't been following this thread so I thought I would go back a couple of pages to try and pick it up. So I understand it about a male who keeps sheep and suffers a lot of misfortune but there appears to be a lot of abbreviations of peoples names who are part of his life. Would there be any chance of posting a directory of these names and what part they play in his life be it family/relative/neighbour/worker ect. Just to try and have a cleare picture in my head

Now that's cheating! I for one think you need to start at the beginning I did, well worth the read

 

[spin cycle]

GLOSSARY

I'm sorry I haven't been following this thread so I thought I would go back a couple of pages to try and pick it up. So I understand it about a male who keeps sheep and suffers a lot of misfortune but there appears to be a lot of abbreviations of peoples names who are part of his life. Would there be any chance of posting a directory of these names and what part they play in his life be it family/relative/neighbour/worker ect. Just to try and have a cleare picture in my head

i'm a sucker for a new reader/potential likey giver

me....mrs spin=wife...boy=my son nq teacher.....HH eldest daughter femme fatale....cinders abused teenage daughter,,,...admiral =my 80 yr old mum....lush HH's boyfriend

village shop in next village run by arkwright helped by granville and daughter annie

our liveries....the peacock (cos he supports leeds).....owl (cos he supports sheff wed).....strawbs + aggy soon to be arriving

friends/family....weeta and cakes(wife's sister) c/w her son dude (hippy).....nev digger driver extrordinaire....muad dib/kirk best friend from school...osf old school friend of mrs spin.....the cat (after the cat in red dwarf).....bopeep my sheep shearer who works in mcs dereham and her partner 'shoes' a farrier.....gerry semi retired lady vicar who lives next door

technical terms....snot 'sheep not out today' cept it does mean sheep out.....naaam fakenham......yomb 'yard of many bargains' johnson bros ag dealers in naam

chief snot.....mcenroe (doesn't know if shes in or out)...her m8 billabong....HH's pet milly....fred pet wether

rams... puppydog,carpet fitter,bluey and mcnabs

smeg....old 885xl...last winter carried a converted cattle crush round daily looking for lambings...Spins Mobile Ewe Getter

a 'henson' ...wristy insulting gesture

code panther....you don't wanna know

there get you going @noagain...don't forget the likeys as i'm very needy

think @loddeka read from the start and it took two days like cloddy but that was a while back

edit...forget K...aspiring smallholder and part time helper and miss april official thread totty

daddies little princess....our house drains

thanks to @Cowslip .....the pigeon 'clan'.....pigeon boss....foook foook.....the swiss....pj.....and elvis a naughty pigeon who may/may not've been eaten

spk my builder and also pigeon fancier.....afro ninja uni friend of HH's and the slowest eater i've ever met

hms sheep cycle....my homemade sheep 'handling' system

 

[noagain]

GLOSSARY




i'm a sucker for a new reader/potential likey giver

me....mrs spin=wife...boy=my son nq teacher.....HH eldest daughter femme fatale....cinders abused teenage daughter,,,...admiral =my 80 yr old mum....lush HH's boyfriend

village shop in next village run by arkwright hekped by granville and daughter annie

our liveries....the peacock (cos he supports leeds).....owl (cos he supports sheff wed).....strawbs + aggy soon to be arriving

friends/family....weeta and cakes(wife's sister) c/w her son dude (hippy).....nev digger driver extrordinaire....muad dib/kirk best friend from school...osf old school friend of mrs spin.....the cat (after the cat in red dwarf).....bopeep my sheep shearer who works in mcs dereham and her partner shoes a farrier.....gerry semi retired lady vicar who lives next door

technical terms....snot 'sheep not out today' cept it does mean sheep out.....naaam fakenham......yomb 'yard of many bargains' johnson bros ag dealers in naam

chief snot.....mcenroe (doesn't know if shes in or out)...her m8 billabong....HH's pet milly....fred pet wether

rams... puppydog,carpet fitter,bluey and mcnabs

smeg....old 885xl...last winter carried a converted cattle crush round daily looking for lambings...Spins Mobile Ewe Getter

a 'henson' ...wristy insulting gesture

code panther....you don't wanna know

there get you going @noagain...don't forget the likeys as i'm very needy

think @loddeka read from the start and it took two days like cloddy but that was a while back

GLOSSARY




i'm a sucker for a new reader/potential likey giver

me....mrs spin=wife...boy=my son nq teacher.....HH eldest daughter femme fatale....cinders abused teenage daughter,,,...admiral =my 80 yr old mum....lush HH's boyfriend

village shop in next village run by arkwright hekped by granville and daughter annie

our liveries....the peacock (cos he supports leeds).....owl (cos he supports sheff wed).....strawbs + aggy soon to be arriving

friends/family....weeta and cakes(wife's sister) c/w her son dude (hippy).....nev digger driver extrordinaire....muad dib/kirk best friend from school...osf old school friend of mrs spin.....the cat (after the cat in red dwarf).....bopeep my sheep shearer who works in mcs dereham and her partner shoes a farrier.....gerry semi retired lady vicar who lives next door

technical terms....snot 'sheep not out today' cept it does mean sheep out.....naaam fakenham......yomb 'yard of many bargains' johnson bros ag dealers in naam

chief snot.....mcenroe (doesn't know if shes in or out)...her m8 billabong....HH's pet milly....fred pet wether

rams... puppydog,carpet fitter,bluey and mcnabs

smeg....old 885xl...last winter carried a converted cattle crush round daily looking for lambings...Spins Mobile Ewe Getter

a 'henson' ...wristy insulting gesture

code panther....you don't wanna know

there get you going @noagain...don't forget the likeys as i'm very needy

think @loddeka read from the start and it took two days like cloddy but that was a while back

I'm sorry but there is not a chance I'm starting at the beginning, I've read this 3 times and haven't worked out a quarter of it If I have to print it to use as a reference note it'll be Christmas before I catch up. Who knows @nithdale may be married by then

 

[spin cycle]

SENIOR MOMENTS

first duty of the day was to bury the fat spaniel....but first i thought i'd let the last 25 treated store lambs out....which i did via hms sheep cycle....into the wrong field......16 headed off to the ewes....8 got thru horse fence into paddocks and five of those were later found rumaging in the liveries hay/straw store.....today's pic


OK ...burial party....i start to dig....the size of the fat spaniel in mind....that'll do.....go to get her.....retreat for wheelbarrow .....get to hole....of course it's to small....it starts to rain......just the dustcart arrives....thinks.....'YOU DIDN'T' i hear you cry.....no i didn't ....fekkin wished i had though as i dug in rain...thing is mum was out on the fields checking sheep and i wanted it done/dusted before she came back......as a result it maaaay not be quite optimum depth.....north norfolk is quite well known for birdwatching...we had a rare summat t'other day and twitchers flocked in......that in mind it'd be just my luck if a 'peruvian burrowing vulture' happened by and was sitting on the mound tommoz

just before lunch i took admiral to inspect the rams....mcnabs passed....carpet fitter failed (miserably) and she doesn't rate bluey the beltex anyway....'he's to short to reach anything' she says....now i was talking about another suffolk but looking at our mart reports charolais seem to be popular up there so perhaps we'll go that route.....later she's on the phone ringing round....under the circumstances i indulge her
(HH if you're reading this don't tell yer mother)

resta the day is mucking out.....then dentist for denture fitting.....FAIL....aka dwayne dibley.......send them back

back home mrs spin has sent for tanker to empty 'daddies little princess',,,,,,'garden really was smelling' mrs spin says 'you'll have to do something'.......my mind wanders back....i'm sure i read on here about someone who put a dead calf in their septic tank and swore it helped...of course i don't have a dead calf but i did have a fat spaniel earlier

 

[Chopsy Varmint]

GLOSSARY




i'm a sucker for a new reader/potential likey giver

me....mrs spin=wife...boy=my son nq teacher.....HH eldest daughter femme fatale....cinders abused teenage daughter,,,...admiral =my 80 yr old mum....lush HH's boyfriend

village shop in next village run by arkwright helped by granville and daughter annie

our liveries....the peacock (cos he supports leeds).....owl (cos he supports sheff wed).....strawbs + aggy soon to be arriving

friends/family....weeta and cakes(wife's sister) c/w her son dude (hippy).....nev digger driver extrordinaire....muad dib/kirk best friend from school...osf old school friend of mrs spin.....the cat (after the cat in red dwarf).....bopeep my sheep shearer who works in mcs dereham and her partner 'shoes' a farrier.....gerry semi retired lady vicar who lives next door

technical terms....snot 'sheep not out today' cept it does mean sheep out.....naaam fakenham......yomb 'yard of many bargains' johnson bros ag dealers in naam

chief snot.....mcenroe (doesn't know if shes in or out)...her m8 billabong....HH's pet milly....fred pet wether

rams... puppydog,carpet fitter,bluey and mcnabs

smeg....old 885xl...last winter carried a converted cattle crush round daily looking for lambings...Spins Mobile Ewe Getter

a 'henson' ...wristy insulting gesture

code panther....you don't wanna know

there get you going @noagain...don't forget the likeys as i'm very needy

think @loddeka read from the start and it took two days like cloddy but that was a while back

edit...forget K...aspiring smallholder and part time helper and miss april official thread totty

Please can The Glossary be printed on the back of the calendar?

 

[Chopsy Varmint]

SENIOR MOMENTS

first duty of the day was to bury the fat spaniel....but first i thought i'd let the last 25 treated store lambs out....which i did via hms sheep cycle....into the wrong field......16 headed off to the ewes....8 got thru horse fence into paddocks and four of those were later found rumaging in the liveries hay/straw store


OK ...burial party....i start to dig....the size of the fat spaniel in mind....that'll do.....go to get her.....retreat for wheelbarrow .....get to hole....of course it's to small....it starts to rain......just the dustcart arrives....thinks.....'YOU DIDN'T' i hear you cry.....no i didn't ....fekkin wished i had though as i dug in rain...thing is mum was out on the fields checking sheep and i wanted it done/dusted before she came back......as a result it maaaay not be quite optimum depth.....north norfolk is quite well known for birdwatching...we had a rare summat t'other day and twitchers flocked in......that in mind it'd be just my luck if a 'peruvian burrowing vulture' happened by and was sitting on the mound tommoz

just before lunch i took admiral to inspect the rams....mcnabs passed....carpet fitter failed (miserably) and she doesn't rate bluey the beltex anyway....'he's to short to reach anything' she says....now i was talking about another suffolk but looking at our mart reports charolais seem to be popular up there so perhaps we'll go that route.....later she's on the phone ringing round....under the circumstances i indulge her
(HH if you're reading this don't tell yer mother)

resta the day is mucking out.....then dentist for denture fitting.....FAIL....aka dwayne dibley.......send them back

back home mrs spin has sent for tanker to empty 'daddies little princess',,,,,,'garden really was smelling' mrs spin says 'you'll have to do something'.......my mind wanders back....i'm sure i read on here about someone who put a dead calf in their septic tank and swore it helped...of course i don't have a dead calf but i did have a fat spaniel earlier

You may be revisited by Fat Spaniel if the foxes dig her up from her shallow grave, although I'm not so sure about her benefiting the septic tank. Anyway, there's a lammergeier in the Fens just now so you may not be too far off the mark with a Peruvian burrowing vulture.

 

[Chopsy Varmint]

View attachment 915797

That's a great photo of happy fat bottoms to wave at the vegan protesters

 

[spin cycle]

. Anyway, there's lammergeier in the Fens just now .

we don't want none a that ferign lager rund ere

 

[Chopsy Varmint]

we don't want none a that ferign lager rund ere

Well no, of course not. It ought to be in the Alps but maybe it got offended by the lederhosen and fled north. Best keep wearing your shorts to scare it away.

 

[Cowslip]

GLOSSARY




i'm a sucker for a new reader/potential likey giver

me....mrs spin=wife...boy=my son nq teacher.....HH eldest daughter femme fatale....cinders abused teenage daughter,,,...admiral =my 80 yr old mum....lush HH's boyfriend

village shop in next village run by arkwright helped by granville and daughter annie

our liveries....the peacock (cos he supports leeds).....owl (cos he supports sheff wed).....strawbs + aggy soon to be arriving

friends/family....weeta and cakes(wife's sister) c/w her son dude (hippy).....nev digger driver extrordinaire....muad dib/kirk best friend from school...osf old school friend of mrs spin.....the cat (after the cat in red dwarf).....bopeep my sheep shearer who works in mcs dereham and her partner 'shoes' a farrier.....gerry semi retired lady vicar who lives next door

technical terms....snot 'sheep not out today' cept it does mean sheep out.....naaam fakenham......yomb 'yard of many bargains' johnson bros ag dealers in naam

chief snot.....mcenroe (doesn't know if shes in or out)...her m8 billabong....HH's pet milly....fred pet wether

rams... puppydog,carpet fitter,bluey and mcnabs

smeg....old 885xl...last winter carried a converted cattle crush round daily looking for lambings...Spins Mobile Ewe Getter

a 'henson' ...wristy insulting gesture

code panther....you don't wanna know

there get you going @noagain...don't forget the likeys as i'm very needy

think @loddeka read from the start and it took two days like cloddy but that was a while back

edit...forget K...aspiring smallholder and part time helper and miss april official thread totty

daddies little princess....our house drains

Spin I think you forgot the pigeon clan in your glossary

 

[spin cycle]

...and remember to take notes @noagain 'cos there'll be a test later 👩‍🎓👨‍

which you will fail

 

[yellowbelly]

You may be revisited by Fat Spaniel if the foxes dig her up from her shallow grave, although I'm not so sure about her benefiting the septic tank. Anyway, there's a lammergeier in the Fens just now so you may not be too far off the mark with a Peruvian burrowing vulture.

.as a result it maaaay not be quite optimum depth

May I draw my learned friends' attention to an entry in the Shite Club diary of March 5th 2016, post #2542..............

in the shite club

They're not real, you know. :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO: No way, you can't fool me :)

thefarmingforum.co.uk

Over 4yrs ago and I'm still on the naughty step

 

[AftonShepherd]

.....but first i thought i'd let the last 25 treated store lambs out....which i did via hms sheep cycle....into the wrong field......16 headed off to the ewes....8 got thru horse fence into paddocks and five of those were later found rumaging in the liveries hay/straw store.....today's pic .....

Surely I'm not the only one sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to find out where the 25th lamb ended up?

 

[Matthew Britton]

Well no, of course not. It ought to be in the Alps but maybe it got offended by the lederhosen and fled north. Best keep wearing your shorts to scare it away.

NO DONT ENCOURAGE HIM!!!!!!

 

[Chopsy Varmint]

NO DONT ENCOURAGE HIM!!!!!!

 

[ImLost]

@spin cycle , cough (Crusoe and Wilkin) cough
And also for your pleasure...... Mr Barry Hawkins with a dairy farm dispersal.....
Both have online bidding

When/where??? I always seem to find out about all these auctions a month too late

 

[carbonfibre farmer]

When/where??? I always seem to find out about all these auctions a month too late

Crusoe is Oct 31st at terrington St Clements. All Massey gear. Looks nice.
Bazza, is sat , I think, peterboghorror way somewhere. I'm sure there be something there for you but.....bazza and dairy farm sale

 

[spin cycle]

Surely I'm not the only one sitting on the edge of my seat waiting to find out where the 25th lamb ended up?

all numbers approx ...OK back to the relative 'safety' of ma diary thread......i've been naughty and bin pullin da tail of da big boss dog on the RT' thread

a largely uneventful day...by feck i'm due one

have a bitta lie in start at 9am.....nice day and i endulge the admiral as we ride round feeding checking flock for over an hour....looking after her is as much my job as running the farm...resta day is leisurely pottering about and mucking out...postman brought a nice cheque for culls....bit more than i was expecting.....take it and last mart cheque and pay in at post office

forgot to mention i've started feeding the first 'home'n dry' barley....so far so good....but i think i might've over fed today ,,,,seems a delicate art to get it right....i'd like them to be on adlib but not quite brave enough yet....the other lambs arn't exactly tucking into the forage rape....there was me worried they'd fall on it and get bloat

 

[Flat 10]

Crusoe is Oct 31st at terrington St Clements. All Massey gear. Looks nice.
Bazza, is sat , I think, peterboghorror way somewhere. I'm sure there be something there for you but.....bazza and dairy farm sale

I love Bazza....