Just how I was taught... nearly seen but not heard. Its not really the parents fault these days, no good parent wants their kids taken away. I often wonder with my boys when they are acting up where the benefit of "time out" is vs a good smacked arse... one larrup is not forgotten fast... sending them to their bedroom as punishment... wtf, you want them to be happy when they go to bed not see it as a punishment room. 3 yo here is constantly overstepping the mark and I find it quite saddening that for the short time I see him of an evening it's often interrupted with "time out". Looking back, having threat of the whip from the old dear and a bruised arse half a dozen times over childhood the rest was very simple and happy.... purely because you knew the line and tried not to overstep it.... we had it far better before all this nonsense. Educate them, but don't beat them OP.... only ever will you be doing your DIL a favour long term. Had the opposite with ex wife's family, grand parents let them get away with murder... MIL didn't talk to me for 3 months when I told my daughter to get off the table and sit down, I think I was right in telling her it's not OK to walk up and down the table mid Sunday lunch... I just don't see the place for that personally, unless the future is pole dancing... and I don't want her into that!My parents many moons ago would all ways told us when we went to the grandparents ,,Speak when you are spoken to and not before ,never ask without first saying please and thankyou . If they were talking ,not to interrupt and don't be nosey .
Young parents nowadays have lost the ability to square their kids up ,too frightened to do anything incase the little darlings report them and social services come knocking .
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