The Queens, reps and the patter.

[Pheasant Surprise]

Millennial text speak...

"hiya m8 u stil got xxxx for sale can colct todya ..wood u take <insert f**king insulting offer> for it."

No. Politely f**k off.

 

[Paddington]

Had a boss who would ask me to touch base with a client, give him a heads up, with a sit rep at the close of play and to keep him in our sights. Never knew if I was supposed to play baseball, cricket or shoot the customer.

 

[7610 super q]

Millennial text speak...

"hiya m8 u stil got xxxx for sale can colct todya ..wood u take <insert fudgeing insulting offer> for it."

No. Politely fudge off.

Next.

 

[7610 super q]

Millennial text speak...

"hiya m8 u stil got xxxx for sale can colct todya ..wood u take <insert fudgeing insulting offer> for it."

No. Politely fudge off.

Interested.

 

[cousinjack]

I'll ping you a email about it later.

God I hate that phrase !!

 

[Suffolk Serf]

and "my bad".

 

[Derrick Hughes]

Mate has become a normal form of address for persons unknown, in an informal setting, I'm afraid.

By the by, what is the better alternative do we think?
Sir can sound either pikey or pompous. Boss..... I don't think so. Chap is 1960s, and can sound a bit passive aggressive.
On the phone, in a business setting plain Mr is ok, until told otherwise. But those people who ask if it is ok and then address you by your Christian name at the end of every sentence, like punctuation, really get on my nut.

First names every time . It makes a customer feel important, which they should be .
Good afternoon David . How are you ?

 

[Gerbert]

Incidentelly, there was me as a non-native English speaker thinking that "touching base" was getting your hands under a girls shirt...

 

[Bald Rick]

Incidentelly, there was me as a non-native English speaker thinking that "touching base" was getting your hands under a girls shirt...

Skirt.

But do you touch an English fanny or an American fanny?

 

[David.]

Very well Derrick, thanks for asking.
Agree first names, having first established that person is happy to be addressed so.

 

[FonterraFarmer]

i detest being called "mate" !

Nah mate, I detest people who don't spell my surname correctly , because their too fu#king lazy to put any effort in to check that it's correct.

 

[Gerbert]

Skirt.

But do you touch an English fanny or an American fanny?

If things get to that point I doubt I'd be particular about nationality.

 

[glasshouse]

If things get to that point I doubt I'd be particular about nationality.

Yes , but one is at the front, other at the back!

 

[Gerbert]

I guess I'm a bit lost in translation

 

[yellowbelly]

Nah mate, I detest people who don't spell my surname correctly , because their too fu#king lazy to put any effort in to check that it's correct.

You'd have thought anybody would know how to spell 'Farmer'............

................now as to your Christian name, I've always thought Fonterra was a bit out of the ordinary. I could understand it if they got that wrong

 

[Netherfield]

We had an outside telephone bell but most of the time they’d have hung up by the time you got to the house.


The thing that irks me is the use of “aloud” when “allowed” should have been used instead.

"Could of" instead of "Could have".

 

[Johnnyboxer]

First names every time .

It makes a customer feel important, which they should be .

Good afternoon David . How are you ?

Except in Yorkshire....

It would be

" Now then, how are you doing David ? "

 

[stewart]

Very well Derrick, thanks for asking.
Agree first names, having first established that person is happy to be addressed so.

I always address people by their first name, if I have to establish that the person is happy to be addressed that way then they are not worth bothering with anyway.

 

[stewart]

Except in Yorkshire....

It would be

" Now then, how are you doing David ? "

Or Stoke. "Hey up duck"

 

[Derrick Hughes]

Except in Yorkshire....

It would be

" Now then, how are you doing David ? "

I just this min had a message from good old Yorkshire
"Now then not got any Timothy a may b short ov hay as it is"