things that make you smile

[Av Gorritt]

After retrieving the valentines chocolates I bought for the missus off the top of the cupboard I found a grand of cash I didn't know I had.

Well . Lucky ol' you . I have a £3.60 cheque in my desk , and I know exactly where it is !

 

[Av Gorritt]

I sold 6 pork pigs to a local butcher a while back , and the agreed system for payment was to go to his shop the next Saturday morning to draw . I accordingly went there , and he shouted to his wife in the back room "Will you get me those fivers on the top shelf of the wardrobe please " Out she came and handed him a pig choker pile of fivers , but they were the old fashioned big white ones ! Long superceded . "No, not those , the other pile " said he ! I finally got paid with current tender .

 

[Pan mixer]

I sold 6 pork pigs to a local butcher a while back , and the agreed system for payment was to go to his shop the next Saturday morning to draw . I accordingly went there , and he shouted to his wife in the back room "Will you get me those fivers on the top shelf of the wardrobe please " Out she came and handed him a pig choker pile of fivers , but they were the old fashioned big white ones ! Long superceded . "No, not those , the other pile " said he ! I finally got paid with current tender .

Shame that you didn't get the white ones.

White Notes For Sale - Bank Of England White Fivers

Colin Narbeth & Son Ltd - Banknote Specialists - 20 Cecil Court, London WC2N 4HE - Free delivery on all banknote orders to the UK, £7.75 rest of world.

colin-narbeth.com

 

[Av Gorritt]

At the time , I was glad to get ANY sort of banknotes . I am now if it comes to that ! As my old Grandad said "All's fish that comes to the net "

 

[teslacoils]

Just seen the video of the Chinese Mars mission. Their rover will land in may or June. So exciting. I'd go to mars even with zero chance of coming back, and my eldest is certain he will be the first man on mars.

 

[britt]

Well . Lucky ol' you . I have a £3.60 cheque in my desk , and I know exactly where it is !

While emptying my pockets after this years turkey collecting day I found a cheque for £? from last year that had got lost. I'll have to ask the writer for a fresh one when I see him. When he's back from a 4 month trip to Antarctica

 

[teslacoils]

No long to go, Rodney.
Soon be millionaires.

 

[Hjcarter]

Pump finally getting the water down at last!!!.... give it 6 months we'll be pumping it back mind!

 

[Bald Rick]

Gotta love Camilla Long in today’s Sunday Times:

“Boris’s pet was never going to be a prissy water dog or terminally boring cat. He was always going to be a poorly trained , personally dishevelled, mischievous, randy bugger”

 

[Jerry]

Home bred shearling ewe popping out a set of twins without any help or fuss and then loves them straight off.

Smart little outfit.

 

[britt]

I was lying on the roadside verge, top half of me down an inspection chamber rodding the pipe as it was blocked.
I heard a vehicle pull up and someone got out.
I hauled myself out of the hole.
Man can running down the verge. "Are you alright mate ? Oh, yes you are" as he realised what I had been doing. "That's OK then I thought you had collapsed or had an accident or something"
There are some some good people about.

 

[Oat]

I was lying on the roadside verge, top half of me down an inspection chamber rodding the pipe as it was blocked.
I heard a vehicle pull up and someone got out.
I hauled myself out of the hole.
Man can running down the verge. "Are you alright mate ? Oh, yes you are" as he realised what I had been doing. "That's OK then I thought you had collapsed or had an accident or something"
There are some some good people about.

Could have been worse (or better)

PS. I, in no way condone or support rape or assault, and the story is no about me

 

[teslacoils]

See rat. Go get air gun. Come back. Rat still there. One shot from good range. Dead rat. Didn't even squeek - must have been a good shot.

 

[britt]

See rat. Go get air gun. Come back. Rat still there. One shot from good range. Dead rat. Didn't even squeek - must have been a good shot.

I hope you made a sufficiently detailed record of that for your Farm Assurance.

 

[teslacoils]

I hope you made a sufficiently detailed record of that for your Farm Assurance.

Nope. Normally Mrs teslacoils just beats them to death with a spade.

Did speculate if using a humane cage trap; driving it to Chris packham house and releasing it would be better, but didn't know if I had the right license to transport a senient manual that far.

 

[teslacoils]

Sun.
Fert on.
Going to shop to buy a beer.
Children in megaden.

 

[Wombat]

The last hopefully never to be repeated school zoom lesson is done

Productivity should go up about 80% Monday

 

[Celt83]

The last hopefully never to be repeated school zoom lesson is done

Productivity should go up about 80% Monday

We've got another week to go.

Mind you I don't know who's been home schooling who here!

 

[britt]

We've got another week to go.

Mind you I don't know who's been home schooling who here!

That's the benefit of of having numerous children. The older ones have to help the younger (and lets face it, have more "up to date" schooling than us) so that they can get some piece to get their work done. . Only one dining room and the WIFI's crap in the rest of the house.

 

[Pan mixer]

Cows who really don't want to get their bedding dirty at all.