diary of a comedy sheep farm

spin cycle · Nov 7, 2019

so last nights fodder beet webinar was interesting....pat myself on the back for my management so far

,,,,,,metering out the leaf then arrange for some better run back grass once the leaf has gone,,,,in this way you supplement the protein

...of course this is me so next morning...low and behold the ewes had broken through the strip fence onto the bit i was saving for dec

...i leave the feckers to it

....it was pouring with rain....i felt ill....feck that

i did feel bad this morning...one of those days you don't know how to put one foot in front of the other

.....did the 'rounds' then set to cleaning mum's rooms (it was the job i set myself for the morning) finished about 11am and went home to do some book work....i've got a backlog and it's worrying me in my weakened state

.....i sit on sofa and 'flake out'

but waking up i feel a lot better and get on really quite well for the resta the day

....cept i find i owe the vat man another £169

in other news the butcher phoned 'have you a coupla culls?'.....just in from seeing them trashing my plans i was tempted to say 'you can have 200+ of the fekkers'

and i've cooled my interest in a beet harvester...it's to wet to use one anyway and beet ground without leaf will lie even wetter......i did go online via proxibid at the brown and co sale at deeping st nicholas.....the standen harvester made modest £400.....but i declined to bid.....it was fun sitting on the sofa watching and potentially being able to take part in an auction 65 miles away though

NOW...have you ever come across any of this spiritual stuff like tai chi....raki healing ect?......well mrs spin has and brought home 'the balance procedure' tonight

....in the past my sister in law (mrs cat) did raki...that was ok....at least it makes ppl laugh if your having a bad day to say somat like 'my bloody chakras are all over the place just now'

......better though was my venture into tai chi....i took classes in local village hall....i didn't really get it :scratchhead:

....coupla lessons in i was paired with the instructor for a routine....NOW i know now i shoulda said somat like ' i feel the lotus blossom is cleansing my soul' .....but instead of that i said... 'i'm feeling mild indigestion'

......i didn't complete the course

yellowbelly · Nov 7, 2019

spin cycle said:
...but instead of that i said... 'i'm feeling mild indigestion'......i didn't complete the course

spin cycle · Nov 8, 2019

found out why ewes got loose....bloomin feed from fencer had worn thru but wasn't shorting out

.....voss was happy pushing out 10 volts but it was going about 2 foot

......got ewes roughly all back in but got soaked....K back tommoz....better day....proper round up

spent rest of morning pottering about yard....fattening pens fettled....water tanks cleaned out......reckon i can hold about 80 comfortably....HH required some ferrying about

......mule had flat battery

.....where does time go :scratchhead:

......sheep price on the rise is cheering me up but abbatoir we use is fully booked next week.....bit worried about that TBH

...never happened before

late lunch....back home...few phone calls....still feel rough

.....i'm on school run cos mrs spin taken HH to train station....i glance at clock..2:20....40 mins til i need to leave...i close my eyes

.....50 mins later i wake with a jolt...FECK

.....i'm late picking up cinders.....now cakes and weeta's two girls and cinders go to same school and we share transport .....i get to meeting place late and according to cinders 'cakes' is stressed cos she was on a deadline

......bet i'm popular

.....cakes' family nickname is 'spitten''....as in 'spitting feathers'.....should i change her 'handle' :scratchhead:

city loosing again....mind you we lost 34 million quid last year so no wonder we can't afford any new players ......plenty of teams would swap places with us and only 40 mins gone

delilah · Nov 8, 2019

spin cycle said:
city loosing again....mind you we lost 34 million quid last year so no wonder we can't afford any new players ......plenty of teams would swap places with us and only 40 mins gone

losing at half time, whilst we now have the luck of the Irish on our side. A tenner to RABI says we play you next season - you in or are you frit ?

spin cycle · Nov 8, 2019

delilah said:
losing at half time, whilst we now have the luck of the Irish on our side. A tenner to RABI says we play you next season - you in or are you frit ?

HMMM...not 'frit' but not that stupid either

....or am i :scratchhead:

......needs a ponder methinks

spin cycle · Nov 10, 2019

weekend

nice to have a coupla nice days weather

saturday

first thing ...round up ...repair fence....'secure' sheep.....well for now

.....K and i finish about 11am...just as dude arrives...K departs......dude and i set about our 'task'

CONFESSION time

....wrestling with whether to or not....but i did promise to 'tell as it is'

,,,,stupid stupid spin

we've rats in the grainstore

.....i first noticed last monday and thought it might just be a rogue....i leave the doors open during the day and run fans on nice days.....but it comes with risk and i've been caught out.....anyhow last monday i tidied up....set some traps.....by friday i'd caught 5 rats of various sizes

.....i couldn't go on like this....so dude was summoned and we set about a proper clean up

.......eventually it was clear we'd not got enough time to quite finish.....but i had another plan

,,,,,,,heap was pushed up ....blimey the stuff smelled sweet

.....then we enclosed the heap with scaffold boards.....my thinking was to place barbed wire on top....but barbs not close enough.....leccy fence :scratchhead:

...fire risk :scratchhead:

.....i needed something otherwise rats'll just go over the board

....in the end we topped the boards with grease....thinking being the rats won't like grease on their paws and as they try to lick it off it'll be worse

.....meantime we put tunnel traps round outside of the boards.....y'know what...it fekkin worked

.......heap not been troubled and another 'customer' in the trap....we'll also see if anything gets over the boards cos grease'll be smeared

sunday
basic rounds checking/feeding sheep then off to church...remembrance sunday....we're in partner village's church cos ours has a roof leak

........gerry turns out a great sermon

.....but church feels grubby....bat dirt?.....my grainstore was better before i cleaned it

in other news dude and i are thinking if my pigeon club folds we'll go halves and rear some pullets in one of the lofts.....and cuddles is in the news....he only went and dropped a knife that went straight into his foot

....i mean how the feck do you do that

.....he's a likeable fekker

.....anyhoo HH took the train nottingham to derby and has done some cooking for him....bit weird :scratchhead:

........remember ross & racheal from 'friends'?.....anyhoo cuddles and HH were on a 'break'....he was texting some girl....HH found out and dumped him

......being in the 'boys union' i'm gonna stick up for him...thing is HH is always being hit upon so it must've been hard for cuddles sometimes

scottish-lleyn · Nov 10, 2019

Put the grease on the bottom of the boards then the rats cant get a grip to get over.

primmiemoo · Nov 10, 2019

Don't put grease near cuddles ...

Sharpy · Nov 10, 2019

primmiemoo said:
Don't put grease near cuddles ...

Is that a euphemism???

primmiemoo · Nov 10, 2019

Sharpy said:
Is that a euphemism???

Eh?

Well, no, I would worry the poor chap might go skating, and provide us with more entertainment ...

... in bandages ...

spin cycle · Nov 10, 2019

primmiemoo said:
Don't put grease near cuddles ...

saturday afternoon i sent dude to get fat lamb feed...........as i wandered off to do pony i did wonder if it was a good move or whether dude would emerge covered in grease and barley uttering 'uncle jimmy i fell over...'

spin cycle · Nov 12, 2019

coupla mish/mash days

monday

got some lambs going in for freezer wednesday....logistically it meant we had to sort them monday...so we did....gotta coupla cull ewes to go to

....one of the culls is 'bleaty's' mum....she has the 'getting out gene' to add to her faults so she's gone

resta the day it's paperwork...sheep records up to date

....and took van in for mot tuesday

tuesday

OFF TO THE SALE ....great exitement

......went to farm sale at bircham.....had to take mrs spin's car though.....without my van i'm lost though....i keep lottsa handy stuff plus it's the exec boardroom

....so i get there and 2wd cars got to park on grass verges near farm yard

....i park up....coupla blokes get outta car next to me...one complains that he can't understand why this piece of grass isn't concreted....then he turns to me...points to my car and says 'how do ya get on with that?'....i explain we're happy with it and of course it's one of the last low tax models....'huh' he replies...'cars a car should all be the same tax'... turns on his heels and stomps off....actually more of a waddle cos i overhaul them pretty quickly

.....i register ...have look about...i'm after some cell wheels for my webb beet drill

....now i'm expecting a few in a bucket....but when i get there ...well... there musta been 200 all boxed on a pallet....maize/parsnip/beet/carrot different rates

,,,,,i mouch on thinking......some other small lots take my eye but without the van the prospect of waiting about and filling mrs spin's car with agric bric a brac doesn't inspire me

...it starts raining

....feck it i'll go home

later we pick up the van....£500 for service...few bits and mot....but it's all wearing parts....shes 10 yrs old...98k....getting to the stage of thinking about replacing....at this age what you save on depreciation you spend on repairs i reckon :scratchhead:

...then again we're 'comfortable' together.....both of us still go adequately but our bodywork is a bit scratched/ dented

rang norwich livestock market later....thinking about starting to sell there cos local abbatoir seems to be over subscribed at moment....it's 15 miles further and mum doesn't like the idea of our sheep potentially going ritual/ halal but beggars can't be choosers....had a good chat with their new bloke...so we'll see

yellowbelly · Nov 12, 2019

spin cycle said:
resta the day it's paperwork...sheep records up to date

Whoa there Spin

Sheep records "up to date"

- you'll be getting the rest of us a bad name.

spin cycle · Nov 13, 2019

wednesday
early start,,,,took freezer lambs and cull ewes to butcher

a rare dry day....good look at the ewes..one or two limping but i think it's mud getting caught between toes as never the same individual

over to fil's and finally caught up / drafted the last ram lambs from the stores

.....NOW...where prattleys,dogs and skill are absent one has to resort to low cunning.bodging and...comedy

.......the 'catching pen acquired a 'funnel'.....single strand of poly wire with rabbit flexinet underneath....K leading with food....myself on the flank.....with dude in the centre c/w the 'cats' dog....a huskey x ...on a lead....it must've looked comical....but it worked

.......took ram lambs home and into fattening pens

after lunch dude and i weighed a few lambs...tidied /organized pens and inspected our 'poly tunnel repair :scratchhead:

......to the 'untrained' eye it still looks a bit of a wreck? but it's keeping most of the straw dry

....i'm a bit superstitious about finishing it in case the lot blows off again

in other news i'm gutted to find one of my fave emojis ?....is not whistling....but kissing

...

Flat 10 · Nov 13, 2019

spin cycle said:
wednesday
early start,,,,took freezer lambs and cull ewes to butcher

a rare dry day....good look at the ewes..one or two limping but i think it's mud getting caught between toes as never the same individual

over to fil's and finally caught up / drafted the last ram lambs from the stores.....NOW...where prattleys,dogs and skill are absent one has to resort to low cunning.bodging and...comedy.......the 'catching pen acquired a 'funnel'.....single strand of poly wire with rabbit flexinet underneath....K leading with food....myself on the flank.....with dude in the centre c/w the 'cats' dog....a huskey x ...on a lead....it must've looked comical....but it worked.......took ram lambs home and into fattening pens

after lunch dude and i weighed a few lambs...tidied /organized pens and inspected our 'poly tunnel repair......to the 'untrained' eye it still looks a bit of a wreck? but it's keeping most of the straw dry....i'm a bit superstitious about finishing it in case the lot blows off again

in other news i'm gutted to find one of my fave emojis ?....is not whistling....but kissing ...

I haven't liked to ask before but...............
Why no dog Mr Spin?
Or no dirt bike or drone for herding?

spin cycle · Nov 13, 2019

Flat 10 said:
I haven't liked to ask before but...............
Why no dog Mr Spin?
Or no dirt bike or drone for herding?

90% of time catching is no problem.......fully (over

) bucket trained

dirt bike not really much use for final catch in a pen.....we do use mule or gator a bit but we're off site

have you any idea of the chaos if i had a dog....or tried a drone

Flat 10 · Nov 13, 2019

spin cycle said:
90% of time catching is no problem.......fully (over) bucket trained

dirt bike not really much use for final catch in a pen.....we do use mule or gator a bit but we're off site

have you any idea of the chaos if i had a dog....or tried a drone

I thought it would be another chapter in the book........

One of the many things putting me off sheep is trying to train a collie..........

Matthew Britton · Nov 13, 2019

Flat 10 said:
I thought it would be another chapter in the book........
One of the many things putting me off sheep is trying to train a collie..........

One of the more rewarding things I have done was training my collie. You just need patience and a good dvd to sit them in front of for a few hours ?

yellowbelly · Nov 13, 2019

Flat 10 said:
One of the many things putting me off sheep is trying to train a collie..........

Naaahh - that's the best bit. If you could have shepherd dogs without feckin' sheep life would be bliss

I've just got a new pup...

.....he'll be helluva thing if I don't manage to ruin him in the meantime

spin cycle · Nov 15, 2019

thursday

what fekkin 'orrible wet morning

.....essential services then K and i worm the lambs we brought home wednesday......i decide one individual needs moving as it feels ready....we drag it across yard to more advanced pen

...weigh it then discover it's a ewe lamb and it's a ram pen so drag it back again

i head back home ...i'm supposed to have had a blood test

,,,,,so it's walk in clinic at cromer....on the way back i'll do a lidl shop for mum

.....first up though i drop dude home.....he's nervously happy....the care farm he was supposed to start at last month finally have his security check back and want to see him friday

needless to say i fail to get my blood test.....apparently i'm supposed to have a 'letter' :scratchhead:

....musta lost that?.....got home around 2pm....finished up and skived off?.....why not for feck sake i work a lot of weekend hours.....still feel guilty though

friday

K not in today....fortunately not raining......mrs spin is up early to take cinders to the bus for a school trip....cinders reckons the bus can hold 97 passengers . :scratchhead:

....row of 3 seats ...aisle...2 seats....is that possible :scratchhead:

......anyhoo i have a little lie in?......our kitchen is a mess...mrs spin works hard so i clean it up /set dishwasher going

....at the farm mum and i do the rounds....i ordered some tubby buckets...put them out.....lamb finisher in the pens....tupping tubs for the ewes.....despite the weather the ewes are looking really well

....the arrival of the mule + vittels causes great exitement......some of them don't even bother to feed just run round in general exitement

....raddle marks are appearing thank feck.....am i doing the right thing by subbing 3 ramb lambs for one older tup :scratchhead:

....should i go get some more 'firepower'... am i 'dropping the ball'....or just growing some :scratchhead:

resta the morning i'm power washing troughs...drinkers...pigeon loft...trailer and anything else i can think of

plan to take the afternoon off but doesn't quite pan out like that...instead i'm costing feeds up :scratchhead:

....thing is how much barley have i got :scratchhead:

.......does it make sense to use it fattening then if short buy in ewe rolls OR buy some better grub for finishing thus saving barley for lambing :scratchhead:

....HMMM...phone calls made....prices got...head scratched

back to 'growing balls'

.....accountant phoned today to see how end of yr book preps were going....mum said to him we were thinking about doing the whole job ourselves this yr....it's expensive,,,we're under the threshold and i reckon i'm able

.....cue bitta an accountant meltdown

...i've an email coming with cost saving suggestions

...i get on really well with them but they are expensive especially when things are tight

right gotta phone dude....apparently he went to see the farm manager at care farm today and is wanted to assist him

....i'd been teasing him that there'd be lottsa german exchange girl students to chase

...never fekkin guess what they said ...'one of your duties will be supervising exchange students'

.....he was also asked if he could drive a tractor.....he's blagged that a bit i think....does 'kangarooing' my elderly nash straw carting qualify

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