- Location
- South West
A member of our family has historic 'issues', as a way of keeping them happy we (the wider family) have all allowed them to live in a fairly sheltered / fantasy bubble (I include all the farm workers in this, who, and full praise to them, have all helped by ignoring rudeness, and nonsense to keep said individual 'happy'). We've managed this for a long time, ie many, many years, however it's becoming tiresome and there's now more generations involved who don't have to put up with it (and why should they)?
Question is, how would any of you go about addressing this?
It's always been the elephant in the room, and the 'sheltered' one is absolutely deluded about their own importance and seems oblivious to the fact we've all been 'playing along' for years.....ie an adult 'spoilt child'.
If I don't address the issue I feel I'm as bad as previous generations (who have apologised to me for the madness we've all endured and the impact it's had), but I don't want to cause 'an episode' with the one we've been protecting? Catch 22.
This is a monster we have created (not me, wheels were in motion before i was born, I've just played along to keep the harmony) but the 'monster' is now creating untold problems family wide and I'm really struggling not to shut the whole thing down by stating the facts (there's no grey area here, 'issues are 100% nailed on and beyond belief). Why do 'we' still have to sit and suffer whilst the one in the 'wrong' gets a free pass incase they get upset? Equally, I don't want to be cruel and upset this person if I can help it?
If I blurt out everything it could cause major upset as I know and have been told things (all true BTW, I don't mean gossip) that haven't been discussed with certain people for years, if ever, and I don't want to hurt anyone.
How would any of you deal with this?
Any help much appreciated. Very tricky time and I'm going round in circles.
Question is, how would any of you go about addressing this?
It's always been the elephant in the room, and the 'sheltered' one is absolutely deluded about their own importance and seems oblivious to the fact we've all been 'playing along' for years.....ie an adult 'spoilt child'.
If I don't address the issue I feel I'm as bad as previous generations (who have apologised to me for the madness we've all endured and the impact it's had), but I don't want to cause 'an episode' with the one we've been protecting? Catch 22.
This is a monster we have created (not me, wheels were in motion before i was born, I've just played along to keep the harmony) but the 'monster' is now creating untold problems family wide and I'm really struggling not to shut the whole thing down by stating the facts (there's no grey area here, 'issues are 100% nailed on and beyond belief). Why do 'we' still have to sit and suffer whilst the one in the 'wrong' gets a free pass incase they get upset? Equally, I don't want to be cruel and upset this person if I can help it?
If I blurt out everything it could cause major upset as I know and have been told things (all true BTW, I don't mean gossip) that haven't been discussed with certain people for years, if ever, and I don't want to hurt anyone.
How would any of you deal with this?
Any help much appreciated. Very tricky time and I'm going round in circles.